Cubs Cut Three
Muskat says club-jester Ed Campusano, porn star Rocky Roquet and bonus baby Andrew Cashner have been re-assigned to the currently non-existent minor league camp. Mitch Atkins and his 15.75 ERA remains. Jeff Stevens didn't do himself any favors today either.
I've been doing links for most of the week so no TCR Friday Notes, but I thought this excerpt about Milton Bradley and the media crush was worth mentioning from one of my favorite new Cubs blogs - Tales from Aisle 424.
...That will be preferable to having a daily Bradley Tantrum Watch that will only serve to antagonize the man:
"Hey
Milton, you pissed yet? How about now? A little angry? Even a little?
Seriously? Everything is good and happy? You think you'll get pissed?
When do you think? Now? How about now? No? OK..... BOOOO!! How about
now? 'Cause if you don't get off to a good start, you'll be hearing
some of that from the bleachers. Ask Jacque Jones. Does that piss you
off? Hypothetically? Still all good? OK - see you tomorrow. Unless, you
know, you want to get something off your chest now. No? OK, then. You
should talk to Jacque though, he'll tell you. Maybe Corey Patterson.
They'll both tell you how it is. Want Todd Hundley's number too? I have
to tell you, you seem like you are a bit agitated. Is it because you're
hurt? You know, because you're always hurt? I know I'd be frustrated.
You know what helps with that? Talking it out. Just vent it all out.
No? Alright then. Hey! Oh, sorry... you just wanted to shake my hand. I
thought you were going to take a swing at me. You don't want to do
that, right? Yeah - my bad. Sorry. OK, this time I really have to go.
Here I go. Now. Nothing? Damn...."
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Comments
Re: Cubs Cut Three
on Fri, 03/06/2009 - 6:56pm Permalink
actual humor from a sports blog site that doesn't rely on 'OMG THAT'S DUMBASS SHIT, YO! AM I RIGHT? AM I RIGHT? I'M RIGHT, YO!', a single joke that repeats for 10 paragraphs, or jokes that just aren't funny because they were executed very poorly in writing to begin with.
go internet evolution.
Re: Cubs Cut Three
on Fri, 03/06/2009 - 7:14pm Permalink
WHY DID WE TRADE DEROSA?!?!?!/!?!!11111?!?
Re: Cubs Cut Three
on Fri, 03/06/2009 - 7:17pm Permalink
*FART* I'M A STUPID CUBS GM *FART* *FART* *FART* <---- HAHAHAHHAHAHA
Re: Cubs Cut Three
on Fri, 03/06/2009 - 7:32pm Permalink
(Insert donut and the GM joke here)
Re: Cubs Cut Three
on Fri, 03/06/2009 - 7:41pm Permalink
expand that 1 joke to 1000 words and insert your own personal feelings along the way as fact and you got a par-for-the-course sports blog humor article.
be sure to mix real facts in with your opinions in order to explain the basis for your jokes. that makes it even more humorous while making it look like you know what you're talking about because you did your research. those that find that bad writing obviously don't "get jokes" so don't worry about those tools. *pops collar*
Re: Cubs Cut Three
on Fri, 03/06/2009 - 7:55pm Permalink
Vlad a year older than his listed age...so say the world of roto...34 instead of 33.
Re: Cubs Cut Three
on Fri, 03/06/2009 - 8:11pm Permalink
Dealbreaker. DFA him.