Game 61 Recap: Cubs 1, Bleached Hosiery 4
A Dank Day.
W - Danks (5-5)
L - Dempster (4-4)
S - Jenks (15)
Things to Take from This Game
1. K to BB
Danks walked none and struck out nine. Dempster walked six and struck out four. You tell me how the day went.
2. The Cubs' "Offense"
Was "led" by two bloop singles by Milton Bradley.
3. Sox scratch it out
Dempster almost was effectively wild. Alexei Ramirez hit a home run in the first, but the other runs were products of some effective small ball played by Guillen and the Sox - a couple of impressive bunt plays, a sacrifice fly, and a squib triple accounted for the rest of the Sox scoring. The story here isn't a weak performance by Dempster or Danks looking unhittable; it's Cubs hitters continuing to swing from their asses and producing nothing.
The "I bought a bad-ass new computer, and all I have to show for it is this stinking recap?" details, below.
Game Recap
Pregame
- Noooo, oh God, No. We get the White Sox telecast for today's game, after Len and Bob's telecast got rained out yesterday. It is a cruel and malevolent god who rules the baseball airwaves.
Inning 1 - Top
- Game starts with Dempster throwing a fastball for a strike to Podsednik, low outside corner, 88 mph.
- Podsednik hits a sharp liner to center, forcing Johnson to go back on it for the catch. Hawk pours forth some stream of nonsense that he thinks counts as baseball lingo, I think he meant to say "Podsednik hit that ball well."
- 0-2 on Alexei. A few pitches later, he throws his bat at the ball, and at Dempster, to foul one off.
- Ramirez hits one into the left-center basket for a home run. Hawk gives it a double-"yes." Looks like a fastball outside and up. 0-1 Sox
- 3-1 to Dye, and he hits a big two-hopper to Theriot.
- First-pitch fastball to Konerko, who hits it sharply, but on the ground right to Fontenot. Inning over.
Inning 1 - Bottom
- Danks' first pitch is a fastball inside for a ball. Fastball up and out for 2-0 count.
- Hawk now talking about spinning hitters. In what world does Soriano have a "spin" in his swing like Fukudome? Hawk's, I guess.
- full count to Soriano, Soriano swings ahead of and over a changeup.
- Theriot grounds to short.
- 3-2 to Bradley, a changeup outside off the plate leads to a soft fly out to center.
Inning 2 - Top
- AJ hits a sharp fly ball to left-center, no problem for Johnson.
- Brian Anderson hits one off the end of the bat, dumps it into shallow right, near the line. Stone points out that Bradley pulled up a bit on the ball.
- Gets also dumps one down the right field line, this time getting it past Bradley, so that it rolls to the wall. Hawk's cheering for the ball to get past Bradley was the key to the whole play. It's a triple, Anderson scores, 0-2 Sox.
- Fastball inside to Getz, who chops it to Theriot. The infield drawn in, Anderson holds at third.
- And again, Hawk cheers for a pop fly off Danks' bat to drift out of play, and it does. Hawk is 2-2 in the telekenisis, today.
- Danks K's swinging.
Inning 2 - Bottom
- Lee chops a single through the 6-5 hole, just out of the reach of Beckham. Got a bit of a bad read on the hop.
- And Soto hits a sharp bouncer down the third-base line, just a step or so to Beckham's right. He tried to get in front of it, when, as Hawk correctly points out, he should have backhanded it. It skips away, and goes for a very, very generous "hit" for Soto. Hawk berates the call, and what do you know? It's changed to an error. Hawk has other-worldly powers, today.
- A third ball hit to Beckham, and this time he turns the 5-4-3 on Johnson. Lee to third.
- 2-0 on Fontenot, he grounds one to Konero 3-1 putout. Nuts.
Inning 3 - Top
- Podsednik walks on four straight.
- Alexei K's swinging, I somehow missed it
- Podsednik steals second, 2-0 count to Dye. Hawk and Steve point out that Miles was a couple of steps off of the base, presumably trying to better block it from the head-first sliding Podsednik. Hawk hopes to see someone head-first slide into Miles' groin, next time. In come the Mench and Bochy big-head jokes.
- and Dye walks.
- Konerko bounces into the 6-4-3.
Inning 3 - Bottom
- Miles bounces one back to Danks.
- Dempster K's looking at a big sweeping curve.
- Soriano comes up to bat in an 0-2 count.
- And swings ahead of and over another change up. I think I hear some boos over the "He Gone!"
Inning 4 - Top
- AJ with a weak tapper to Fontenot.
- And Brian Anderson walks on four straight.
- Full count to Getz, K's swinging, with Soto throwing out Anderson at second. Nice DP, good throw by Soto.
Inning 4 - Bottom
- Theriot with a sharp bouncer to Bechkam's left. he dives for it, it gets away, picked up, but Theriot beats the throw.
- Bradley loops one into shallow left center. With Theriot going to third, Podsednik tries to throw him out but Alexei cuts the throw, just maybe 20 feet from the base. Podsednik looks upset that it got cut off, Bradley wasn't going anywhere at first. Runners at 1 and 3 for Lee, no outs.
- Lee with a soft looper into straight-away center. Anderson catches it at his shin, running and stumbling. Theriot tags, makes a start, then holds at third. Stone things he needed to go for it, Hawk isn't so sure, sympathizes with Theriot. I'm with Hawk.
- Soto swings over a changeup, strike three. 2 out, Theriot still at third.
- Johnson, like Soto, Soriano, swings wildly through a changeup for strike one. Von Joshua has some work to do....
- Johnson bounces out to Beckham, 5-4 putout. Nuts. 2 innings with 2 on, 0 outs, and no runs to show.
Inning 5 - Top
- Danks surprisingly has throw more pitches than Dempster through 4: 64 to 60.
- Hanging slider, Beckham lines it into right for a single.
- Danks bunts to Dempster, moving Beckham over.
- Podsednik squibs one down the line to Fontenot, easy out, Beckham holds.
- 0-2 to Alexei as he swings over a splitter.
- Next splitter goes maybe 55 feet, two feet outside. Soto doesn't have a chance, Beckham to third.
- Dempster hangs a breaking pitch, but Alexei gets under it, flies to Soriano.
Inning 5 - Bottom
- Fontenot K's on a check-swing foul-tip. That has to be about the worst way to K.
- Aaron Miles' beard is way too manly for a guy wiht that squirly batting stance.
- and Miles also K's swinging, fastball low and off the outside corner.
- That was quick, Dempster flies out to left-center.
Inning 6 - Top
- 2-0 to Dye, he grounds one to Fontenot, playing deep and toward the line. A long throw, Lee makes a great scoop save for the out.
- A couple very bad misses with splitters, and it's 3-2 to Konerko
- Lined shot right back at Dempster. Real rocket. Dempster manages to get a glove on it as it's hit right at his glove-side, knocking it down and getting Konerko at first. Yowza. Yowza, I say.
- Full count to AJ. Seems like Danks and Dempster have struggled a lot, yet the game's flying along.
- AJ K's swinging at a splitter.
Inning 6 - Bottom
- Soriano with a quick flyout to Dye
- and Theriot to Podsednik. Danks just mowing them down now.
- Nevermind, Bradley drops another hit in, to right field on a chest-high fastball.
- Lee waves through a changeup. That's 7 K, 0 BB so far for Danks.
Inning 7 - Top
- Getz is trying to bunt his way on, but instead takes ball four.
- Dempster: 100 pitches, 50 balls and 50 strikes. Guzman up in the bullpen, as it's 2-0 on Beckham
- Hawk tries to cover his telekinetic ass, and yells "Ball Four Base Hit" as Dempster delivers the 3-1 to Beckham. It's Ball Four. Not counting that as another datum point in my argument for Hawk's telekinetic powers. Dempster leaves with 6+ IP, 6 BB and 4 K.
- Wild play as Danks shows bunt while the Cubs put on the Wheel defense. Danks pulls back, swings, and Guzman makes a very nice grab, throwing to second where he barely gets Beckham. Runners at 1 and 3.
- And now Podsednik drag bunts up the first base line on a squeeze play, then beats everyone to the bag at first. 0-3 Sox. Parachat thinks Miles was slow to cover first.
- Alexei rolls into a slow 4-6-3, just out at first.
Inning 7 - Bottom
- Soto flies out to Dye.
- Johnson's just wailing away with his swings. K's at a high outside fastball.
- Fontenot K's swinging at what I think is a slider. 9 Ks for Danks.
Inning 8 - Top
- Leadoff walk to Dye.
- Konerko battles back from behind in the count, and inside outs a high fastball on a hit-and-run play. Miles is moving to cover the bag, and the ball sails right behind him. Runners at 1 and 3, no outs.
- AJ hits a very short fly into left center, and Soriano makes a nice running catch. Dye tags, and Soriano, unable to right himself, hits Dye in the back with the throw, allowing Konerko to advance. A tough error for Soriano, and it's 0-4 Sox
- Anderson with a slow roller to Theriot, 6-3 putout. Anderson seems to have stepped on Lee a bit as Lee backed into him in response to a low throw. Konerko to third.
- Getz bloops out to Fontenot.
Inning 8 - Bottom
- Miles doubles inside the third-base line.
- Danks out, Linebrink in, the many Sox fans boo.
- First pitch fastball to Jake Fox, hitting for Guzman. He gets all of it, but with the wind blowing in, Anderson makes a fine leaping catch into the ivy, just to the right of the 368 sign in left-center. Miles tags and goes to third. Nuts.
- Soriano rolls out to Alexei, 6-3. Miles scores, and a very lame RBI for Soriano. 1-4 Sox
- Theriot takes a rip at an inside fastball, strikes out.
Inning 9 - Top
- Ascanio in, Fox into left for Soriano, double-switch. Jenks warming up. Dear god, you can see his nasty-ass beard from outer space.
- Beckham with a soft liner into shallow left, and Fox makes a nice running catch with a tumbling barrel-roll to cap it off.
- Thome hits for Linebrink. Full count, and drives a ball toward the left field well, where the wind holds it up for an easy fly-out.
- Full count to Podsednik, who pokes one in front of Fox in left for a hit.
- Game really slowing down with Ascanio pitching and Podsednik on. 3-2, 2 outs to Alexei, K's swinging at a slider low and away.
Inning 9 - Bottom
- Jenks in. Bradley fooled badly by a slider that dips sharply into the dirt, striking out.
- Lee rolls out to short.
- Soto with a high fly to straight away center, eliciting another double "Yes!" from Hawk, who sounds as though he is in ecstacy.
Parachat Recap
Inning 1
- quality of mlb.tv video
- Avoiding work.
- Ozzie
- Alexei's scrawny bod.
- Bad-ball hitters.
- Can you trade a baby that's on the DL,
- and how much can you get for it?
Inning 2
- My new life as a Mac user.
- Traded between games of a double-header.
- long, drawn-out, tacky jokes with bad punch-lines. Our favorite.
- More on the different cable and mlb.tv telecasts
- Beckhams.
- Von Joshua's racial identity
Inning 3
- Vons.
- Lou Diamond Phillips.
- Dorks
- Maroons
- The social construction of race.
- Other slurs and insults with obscure and ugly origins.
- The Joe: Is it a hate crime to beat up a bigot?
- Yes.
- Everyone: we don't like blog networks because they'd bring us more readers.
- And we'd have to stop swearing, again
Inning 4
- Our relationship with MVN
- Parachat loves agreement
- No you don't.
- Other Cubs Blogs
- I'm the arguer at TCR?
- yeah, I guess so. I'll agree with that.
- Some sort of practical joke involving guys who wear tight shirts, Crunch, Rob, Carlos, and pot.
- Start Wang against the Nats for your fantasy team?
- no.
Inning 5
- A long, boring talk about a fantasy league I'm not in.
- God, I don't CARE if you're going to trade Scherzer for Wang. I demand better entertainment than this.
Inning 6
- Fast peeing.
- What % of men regularly wash their hands after peeing?
- Whateve the %, it's not high enough.
- Theraputic qualities of urine?
- Pee-drinking and that fraud, Bear Grylls.
- re-scheduling the rainout.
- Some sort of double entendre about double headers and double shafters that I made sure not to spend much time trying to untangle.
Inning 7
- Getting booed at your job
- the wild bunt plays.
- Where did we leave Bobby Scales?
- at a rest stop in Iowa
- 25th-man discussions.
- Choking Joe Buck, the assault everyone can agree upon!
- Tough love for Bradley?
- and its relation to the Jacques Jones saga
Inning 8
- Jackie Robinson, Hank Aaron, and racist fans.
- When did ballplayers stop taking off-season jobs?
- Kyle Farnsworth claiming he got bit by his dog is really an excuse for.....
- eh sometimes, you really do get bit by your dog.
- Anderson running into Lee. Cheap shot? No, not a Fick-er.
- A-Rod's many transgressions on the ballfield, in the trainer's room, and with the Palin daughters.
- Oh,THAT'S how I'm going to increase traffic to TCR and thereby make back the money I spent on the new computer: I'm going to announce that I have proof that A-Rod shot up a HGH-Heroin cocktail with the Palin daughters, Jose Canseco and Hannah Montana. What could go wrong with this plan?
- More on Macs and PCs
- winning computers at donkey shows, or some Mexican thing like that. Ask Carlos.
- I voted for Mousavi.
Inning 9
- The Iranians are going to execute Theriot, those bastards!
- Er, check that, they're executing Rioters.
- More Iranian current events.
- Bumping into David Wells on the Back Road.
- Oh My.
- Rob shares the offers he gets by email.
- Tattoos
- Parachat devolves.
Cubs' record in post-Hiatus recaps fall to 0-1.
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