Spring Training Narratives: The Mad-Libs Edition.
I was meaning to write a nice update of spring training storylines like Rob has done in the post below, but I'm too busy
reading rejection letters from Universities being chased by spurned Valentines to scour the globe for the informative content that you, the reader deserve.
Then I remembered that it's spring training, and the stories write themselves.
So here are your Mad Libs that need filling in. The story itself is below the fold. (No peeking until you've entered your words!)
1. A Cubs Player
2. A number
3. A celebrity
4. A food
5. A gerund (a verb + ing)
6. A noun
7. A Cubs Player
8. A body part
9. A medical procedure
10. A number
11. A roster position
12. A Cubs Player
13. An adjective
14. A Cubs Player
15. An Adjective
16. A player from another baseball team
17. A sports reporter
18. A retired player
19. An adjective
20. A roster position
21. A feature of Wrigley Field
22. + 23. Two corporations
24. An occupation
25 + 26. Two Celebrities
27. A tragedy
28. A Cubs Player
29. A noun.
As spring training begins,  appears to be in the best shape of his life.  lost  pounds in the offseason by adopting  's fitness plan. This plan involves eating only  and a daily exercise routine of  .
 isn't the only Cub trying to get into mid-season form. Concerns about  's  linger. While  insists he will be ready to go on opening day, others fear that only  will fix the problem. Lou Piniella is relying on  to make at least  starts this year.
Wile most of the roster is settled, one of the top positional battles is for , where  appears to be the favorite but has to compete with more  candidates like . If no one steps up, General Manager Jim Hendry may be forced to sign or trade for a  veteran like . While  is reporting the rumor, Hendry says there has been no effort to coax  out of retirement and play for the team.
Finally, when the team breaks camp and heads for Chicago, expect some  new attractions. In an effort to boost revenue so that Hendry can sign more s, the Cubs have added advertising to the . The ads are specifically designed to fit in with Wrigley's historic ambiance. Among the prominent brands to be found will be  and . Also, a new host of celebrity guest conductors will find their way to the booth for the Seventh Inning Stretch. We don't want to give away too much, but expect to see legendary   perform, and  will be making his (her) first appearnce since .  is a self-professed fan, and hopes to ask him (her) for his (her) .
Yeah... that was some very athletic stuff from Willson in the 9th. Impressive.
I think Chapman and Wood both need 2 days off -- rosters expand, bring 'em up!
Cubs now 41-15 in August in the Maddon era. That'll do. That will effing do.
31 pitches, 2 hits, 1 walk, and 3 wild pitches later...the cubs win by 1.
contreras snagged some other potential wild pitches in this chapman appearance.
22 wins in august. woo.
Down on the farm:
"Dealin'" Cease with another good outing for Eugene. Last 4 outings: 16IP, 1ER 29K. But, 10BB. Throw strikes, kid.
Candelario is killing it at Iowa after struggling at AA: .320/.406/.941 in 241AB. At age 22. Where the heck to put him next year?
UPDATE: Candy goes 3-5 tonight. Now hitting .325. Also, Almora 4-5, which is nice to see.
Happ and Jiminez to play in the AFL. Baseball is the best.
You magnificent Bastardo!
Difference is LaStella sucks, and Chapman doesn't
My guy Addy
he's attempting a comeback (or he's just very bored) and playing indie ball in the atlantic league...short-lived-cub brad snyder is also on his team.
very boring numbers for a guy with his experience in indie ball, though not bad numbers...probably not enough to get him a minor league deal at his age (33)
there goes heyward's gold glove win. bench him and bring up matt murton.
felt like 36 for sure....
Didn't LaHair hit 36 before the All Star Break? Then none after.
@CarrieMuskat 41s41 seconds ago Bryant is 1st #Cubs player to top 35 HRs since Aramis Ramirez hit 38 in 2006
surprised me, thought Soriano may have or Rizzo...maybe LaHair or Schierholtz too :)
Twitter tells me more boo's than cheers for LaStella.
What was the reaction in Chapman's first game? I was there about a week later and it was all cheers.
Not that the situations are a one-to-one, but...damn, priorities 'Murica.