But sometimes in the depths of semi-disaster, one can find inspiration.
This is a new product I figure would sell like hot cakes.
New Cubs Hurl Sacks®.
You know that queasy feeling you get watching the Cubs, and it's ohh, say the
7th and they're clinging to a tiny lead and in comes, well...any one of the Cubs relievers.
Wouldn't it be great to have a Kleenex-sized box of barf bags at the ready, on the side table right next to your frosty cold one?
"Wow" says Bob Brenly, "Marmol is missing the plate by SIX INCHES."
"Ball three." says Len.
Right about now you could just pull out a handy Hurl Sack®, open her up and start gagging.
"He walked him and the bases are loaded."
"Lou's gonna visit the mound."
"He's calling for Aaron Heilman."
"No, wait. He wants Gregg."
And finally, you know, just let it rip.
Toss your Cracker Jacks.
All without ever leaving the comfort of your couch!
All without any mess!
Plus, I guess you could do Yankee Hurl Sacks® or Padre Hurl Sacks® - any team would work.
Man, this is seriously a good idea.
Scott Boras, if you're reading this, gimme a call.
I think I'm gonna need an agent.
Tim Souers is the illustrator and author of Cubby Blue and appreciates the opportunity to guest blog here at The Cub Reporter.
This game is sucking brainless donkey dicks
c.richard pitching in a game where the team is only down by 1?
...2 batters, 0 outs, and 1 run later it's grimm's turn.
Be nice if someone other than the Ace was capable of a shutdown inning after the Cubs score. Can't even get the freaking pitcher out.
...and then he gives up a run, and the lead, on a single by the pitcher. still, 2 runs through 5 is good for him.
I was focusing on the mechanics of the swing, which was awful earlier. He looked ok up there that way.
Two strikes, slider out of the zone, and he swings. Looks familiar. It really makes Bryant's plate discipline look very impressive.
haren's made it through 4 without shitting himself...only 1 run on him. neat.
Tom Seaver has The Cubs number tonight
I hope we get to see a repeat performance of this from Q. Berry.
Baez strikes out in his first at bat, but not whirling dervish style. Just missed it, didn't unwind like a uncoiling spring - just a clean miss. Call me optimistic, but I call that progress.
The Mariners recalled RHP Tony Zych from Triple-A Tacoma. First big league action for the former Cub prospect.
ah, the fair weather fans are back at wrigley.
long popout to CF, not even on the track, and 1/2 the place was popping and cheering like it was gonna end up out of the park.
well, that didn't take long.
11 pitches, voto HR...thankfully, solo.
It'll be interesting to see if Baez is still a whirling dervish at the plate. He's rocking it good in AAA, and I've read some good stuff, so fingers crossed.