How Fast is Reed Johnson?
When you're a young guy, hair that grows in places other than your head is pretty important.
I was a freshman in football this one time when a guy named Paul Holland completely ran me over in a tackling drill.
One of the coaches screams at me, "SOUERS, YOU AIN'T GOT NO HAIR ON YOUR ASS!"
I could tell right away that hair meant huevos, balls, intestinal fortitude.
In college I decided to grow sideburns.
Grew 'em for about 3 weeks.
Wellll, on one side I had to painstakingly and artfully blend hair from my head to mix with all of maybe 14 actual sideburn hairs.
And all that blending was for naught because only 5 actual sideburn hairs grew on the other side.
Bald patch between the head hair and the 5 sideburn hairs - not good.
I cannot grow a mustache or a beard, I have no hair on my chest, and my leg hair kinda petered out in 6th grade.
Reed Johnson seems to be able to grow beards at will and overnight.
I am SO jealous.
But you never know - I may still be maturing.
Well, that hopefully took your mind off of Geovany Soto's "mild" oblique strain and the sloppy, rotten, foul-tasting 1-4 loss to the Braves yesterday.
Kevin Hart came up to take Dempster's place in the rotation.
He did okay, really.
Buncha walks, but okay.
It's these damned wimpy Cub bats.
They have no hair.
And here come the Cardinals...
A little perspective - the Phillies lead the NL with 432 runs scored, St. Louis is 6th with 377, and our favorite team is 15th with 337.
I'm sure you're aware that that's 15th out of 16.
So...not so good.
I'd put a little hair tonic on those bats, boys.
Do that thing where everybody on the team grows a beard or something.
You are going to need to score some runs in these next 4 games.
And if you do, you will have a chance to knock these guys down a peg.
And even though I don't, as a Cub fan I would at least feel like I had some hair on my ass.
Tim Souers is the illustrator and author of Cubby Blue and appreciates the opportunity to guest blog here at The Cub Reporter.
This illustration is in the current issue of VINE LINE.
Not certain why the site has been slowed. Worked much of Wednesday on it and will continue today. Sorry for the inconvenience. I will probably take it offline for a while, but it will be up before the game against the Mets.
Mine has been really slow to load -- on different computers from different locations.
Anybody else have issues accessing the site this afternoon/evening?
Boras is 63, maybe he'll be retired or dead by the time Bryant, Russell, Almora, Albertos all hit free agency. Doubt he will be before Jake hits there though.
Interesting choices when guys get healthy.
LaStella, Fowler & Soler replace Coghlan, Almora and Sczcur? I assume they don't want Almora to sit.
Despite MIggy's demise, I assume they keep him around to mentor Contreras?
I believe Willson now has more CS than MIggy. The kid has an arm. Also, Russell is amazingly good on those plays at 2nd.
oh yeah...thanks joe/billy.
poor outing, still got the win, go cubs.
Although it felt like it, Jake didn't lose to them -- he got the W. (Assuming you are referring to Monday's game)
Arrieta didn't lose to the Reds. He got the win -- he just didn't pitch like we expect him to.
almora's 1st HR!
it's not like this CIN team is lost-cause horrible, but aside from defense and power this is a truly horrible team.
kinda crazy arrieta lost to them and yesterday's game had to go 15 innings for the cubs win.
It looked like Hamilton got screened by Duvall and that Duvall just barely deflected the ball off of his glove--redirecting it slightly without taking away much of its momentum.
At least it didn't turn into a Schwarber/Fowler situation. Hamilton and Duvall are both pretty important youngish players for the Reds.
he walked off the field on his own. aside from a concussion watch and some attention to his leg/knee that buckled a bit under him, the biggest thing hurt was probably his pride after the ball knocked off his skull.
After last night, an inside-the-park HR seems kind of run-of-the-mill somehow.
Sounds bad for Hamilton. Hope he's okay--listening on the radio.
SHOW ME THE MONEY: Jose Albertos has signed with Mega-Agent Scott Boras.
Albertos has already received his signing bonus and won't see any additional significant money until he reaches the big leagues, so this is a long-term investment for the Boras Corporation.
Other Cubs represented by Boras include Jake Arrieta, Kris Bryant, Addison Russell, and Albert Almora Jr.
I am glad Joe is managing this team and not Old and Blue!