Sunday Funnies

Click on the image for the full-size cartoon and story...

You know, just when you think you've seen it all at Wrigley Field.

Somewhere around the 7th or 8th during an Astros game, I'm in the men's room.

I'm sure you've heard the descriptions or even been there, but the layout includes a sort of 5' tall wall in the center of the room, and along both sides are long, metal troughs.

So, you wouldn't call this a place with alot of privacy.

Etiquette demands you look up or maybe straight ahead at the guy across from you.

But out of the corner of my eye I thought the guy next to me was looking in a little mirror or something weird.

Couldn't help it.

I looked.

Guy was writing an email.

Just hangin' free, both hands emailing away and peeing at the same time.

He was so engrossed he didn't notice me staring.

On one hand, maybe it was admirable: not wasting baseball-viewing time with emailing.

On the other hand, he was probably on Twitter, writing "I am peeing in the men's room at Wrigley..."

But without either hand, it was just plain gross.

I scooched down away from him since I was wearing flip-flops.


 Tim Souers is the illustrator and author of Cubby Blue and appreciates the opportunity to guest blog here at The Cub Reporter.
http://www.cubby-blue.com

Comments

nice cartoon but if it is supposed to be Wrigley shouldn't there be an Alien or Predator type thing coming screaming out of the toilet and cutting his nads off with huge incisors?

He's got a hands-free device.

Ryno gets "Post of the Day" award!

didn't Illinois legislature just pass a law prohibiting this?

Illinois House Bill 71
This bill was approved by the House and Senate in May of 2009 and now (July of 2009) and just signed into law by the Governor. House Bill 71, titled "Use of Electronic Communication Devices While Peeing" on the National Conference of State Legislatures NCLS website amends the Illinois code to prohibit the use of electronic communication devices while trough urinating, specifically.

http://tinyurl.com/mabkhd

gotta like Tim's designs on this guy too...

http://www.cubby-blue.com/.a/6a00d83451fe4669e2011...

This one has always been my favorite:

http://www.cubby-blue.com/my_weblog/2009/06/sam-ze...

i was suppose to post that one last week, but techinical difficulties and me going on vacation prevented it.

Might it be a good idea for the Cubs to make a run at John Smoltz? He was DFA'd earlier this week.

True, he's been piss poor for the Red Sox this year, but he's been relatively effective the first time through the line up in his eight starts. Maybe he could be effective in the Cubs bullpen. Plus, he'd be cheap. Boston will be on the hook for the majority of his $5.5 million contract.

I don't know what it would take to get Smoltz, but I can't imagine it would be much.

Smoltz as a reliever? You're crazy. It'd never work.

You're right, TJ. I don't know what I was thinking.

Someone is going to have to help me on the rules surrounding DFAs. Does Smoltz have to accept the DFA? I'm almost positive he doesn't because of his year of service.

If he refuses the DFA, does he become a FA at that point? Once he's a FA, is Boston on the hook any longer for his contract?

I think my original thoughts were that once he was DFA'd, he could be dealt without clearing waivers. However, I think I was wrong.

Theriot, Bradley, DLee, Fox (3B), Fuku, Soriano, Baker, Hill and Wells

RICH HILL had his labrum surgery and as it turned out his shoulder wasn't as bad as previously thought once they got a look.

http://www.baltimoresun.com/sports/orioles/bal-ori...

terrible DP call costs Cubs a run...

Vintage Lou today on the ridiculous blown call on the double play in the second. Thanks umpires... not only can we not keep the team healthy, but we have the umpires playing against us too.

Cubs got Gucci-bagged and Lou got tossed...cost the cubs a run

3 innings 3 errors, Go Defense Go

17 hits
Bradley and Theriot combine for 6/10 at the top of the order
The 3,4,5 hitters all have two hit days
We get 5 doubles and a triple
7 hitters have multi-hit days

how do we turn all that into only 4 runs?

butt ugly today. if the team can't find a way to play .500 or better on the road, ain't no way they make the playoffs.

Re Sunday Funnies, wasn't this story posted once already?

If they can win tomorrow, they can still amazingly finish this trip 5-5. Feels more like 2-8.

I know it sucks to lose but maybe Bradley likes the 2 hole. Could be all good if they can hang in there.

BTW, I really hate the fucking Cardinals. I'd like to see St. Louis drop its dirty wad into the Mississippi and float into the gulf and get blown up by colliding into a fucking oil rig.

Other than that I'm feeling pretty well at peace.

It's funny how having far-and-away the best player in baseball tends to make your team a contender every year, regardless of what's around him. Sucks for us.

http://danny-knobler.blogs.cbssports.com/mcc/blogs...

also thinks WSox put claim in on Rios, Blue Jays won't move him unless they get something worthwhile for him. Retards.

Rays putting a lot of claims in on low-salary players to block Rsox/Yanks...

and please take a new photo Danny Knobler...

nice photo...harvey pekar approves.

I would really be shocked if Rios gets pulled off of waivers. They have Snider waiting. Maybe Riccardi just can't admit to himself that he made a bad deal.

http://espn.go.com/chicago/columns/blog?post=43872...

Levine says Lilly could be back the 17th, Z the 23rd...although he says Z could return when he's eligible to come off the DL, which in actuality is the 17th.

Submitted by Sweet Lou on Sun, 08/09/2009 - 12:00pm.

Someone is going to have to help me on the rules surrounding DFAs. Does Smoltz have to accept the DFA? I'm almost positive he doesn't because of his year of service.

If he refuses the DFA, does he become a FA at that point? Once he's a FA, is Boston on the hook any longer for his contract?

I think my original thoughts were that once he was DFA'd, he could be dealt without clearing waivers. However, I think I was wrong.

==============================

SWEET LOU: When a player is "Designated for Assignment" (DFA'd) it actually means he was placed on his club's Designated List. A player cannot refuse this assignment.

A player on the Designated List is removed from his club's MLB Active List (25-man roster) and MLB Reserve List (40-man roster), but continues to accrue MLB Service Time and continues to get paid while on the Designated List.

When a club places a player on the Designated List, it has ten days to either trade, release, or outright the player to the minors. (NOTE: If the player is not replaced on the 40-man roster by another player and if the player has minor league options remaining, he could be optioned to the minors, but that is rare).

During the ten days the player is on the Designated List, his club will try and trade the player and get something of value back in return (a player and/or cash). If the player isn't traded within ten days, the club has to place the player either on Outright Assignment Waivers or Outright Release Waivers, but if the player has at least five years of MLB Service Time, the player MUST be placed on Release Waivers because players with at least five years of MLB Service Time have the right to refuse an Outright Assignment to the minors and be returned to both the 25-man and 40-man roster, which obviously can't be done if the player was Designated for Assignment. (A player who is Designated for Assignment actually has to be traded within eight days, because it takes two days for a player to clear waivers).

Smoltz has way more than five years of MLB Service Time, so the Red Sox only option would be to trade or release him. So if Smoltz is not traded within eight days (and to get traded now he would also have to clear Trade Assignment Waivers because the July 31st non-waiver trade deadline has passed), he would have to be placed on Release Waivers.

If a player is placed on Release Waivers, he can be claimed for just $1 (one dollar), but the claiming club assumes 100% of the player's contract. Also, a player can decline a waiver claim off Release Waivers and become a free-agent, so players are almost never claimed off Release Waivers.

If a player is placed on Release Waivers and is not claimed, he becomes a free-agent and can sign with any club (this happened recently with B. J. Ryan), and the player's former club is responsible for paying the player's remaining salary minus the pro-rated portion of the MLB minimum salary that is paid by the player's new club.

AZPhil -- Thank you for the knowledge!

Recent comments

Subscribe to Recent comments
The first 600 characters of the last 16 comments, click "View" to see rest of comment.
  • If it was 2006 Hendry would be there w a Bible and a contract
    https://mobile.twitter.com/Ken_Rosenthal/status/77...

    jacos 2 hours 55 sec ago view
  • he subscribes to my twitter, he's beyond TCR. #yolo #swag

    crunch 2 hours 38 min ago view
  • Whoops. Maddon must have been reading TCR (for his daily crunch) and got confused.

    CTSteve 2 hours 41 min ago view
  • kuhl is a righty, not a lefty.

    i think maddon might think kuhl is a lefty, too. i wonder what the reasoning is for baez leading off vs a rightie.

    crunch 3 hours 22 min ago view
  • "trout's one of the best, and at this point should probably win over donaldson (and should have more MVPs in the past, too), but the defensive aspect of valuing WAR still needs more tweaking...imo."

    that's from my 1st post. there's no suck involved in that. maybe with a few less posts about bullshit that point would have jumped out more.

    crunch 4 hours 9 min ago view
  • crunch - you do know that, taking defense out of the equation, Trout has led the AL in wRC+ each of those years, right?

    And, if you want to complain about position adjustment (which would be serious #crunchsplaining), he's been in the top 3 in the AL in WC (not park/league/position adjusted). And the only players ahead of him (if there were any players ahead of him) in any of those years have been DHs or 1B that play lousy defense.

    But sure - Trout sucks (or at least isn't as good as WAR says). Because it factors in defense and position.

    big_lowitzki 5 hours 14 min ago view
  • early tim tebow stuff rolling in...

    ran a 6.7 60yd (above average)...shagging flies in RF and showed off a rather impressive arm a few times, but average-at best on most of his throws...hit a few over the fence (both fields), fouled or weak contact a few...he's got a touch of power

    it'll be interesting to see who bites on this project, if anyone. he probably projected himself out of RF and into LF/1st because of his arm, but unless he can make that power work on a steady basis it'll be hard for him to play himself up anyone's system.

    crunch 5 hours 59 min ago view
  • LHP Clayton Richard (released by the Cubs earlier this month) is pitching very well as a starting pitcher for the San Diego Padres and could be a good candidate to get traded to a contender looking for a veteran SP before tomorrow night's post-season roster eligibility deadline.

    Because they released him, the Cubs are paying most of Richard's 2016 salary (the Cubs are on the hooks for $2M, minus the pro-rated portion of the MLB minimum salary that is paid by the Padres).

    Arizona Phil 7 hours 46 min ago view
  • it is honestly awesome (for real) that anyone would even have a strong opinion on AZL playoffs. i guess if you invest enough time watching it, you want to see a fair/just playoff structure.

    plus, the kids deserve it.

    crunch 7 hours 46 min ago view
  • The AZL team with the best record over the course of the full 2016 AZL season and the only AZL team to play .600 ball (the AZL Dodgers) did not qualify for the AZL playoffs, and the AZL East Division team with the best record over the course of the full season (the AZL Athletics) did not qualify for the AZL playoffs, either. 

    That's because of the ridiculous "split season" schedule most of the minor leagues now play, a stupid system that rewards mediocrity at the expense of the worthy. 

    Arizona Phil 7 hours 53 min ago view
  • Despite good movement on his fastball, I think location kept him from getting Ks. Left some pitches up and away that got hammered up and away. Then of course Travis Wood gave up the 2-run double in the 7th, but both runs counted against Arrieta.

    Charlie 8 hours 30 min ago view
  • "i'm gonna make you my main squeeze one day, bro. save the date."

    This level of discourse is #charming.

    #baseballtalk

    Tito 8 hours 30 min ago view
  • I would be having this discussion with anyone who (a) blathered on ad nauseum about the topic. (See, "Olt, Mike, not given an opportunity") or (b) responded directly to what I posted (which you did).

    Have a nice day.

    #baseballtalk

    Tito 8 hours 33 min ago view
  • what would you do without me? aside from having your posting content here cut by 75%+?

    i'm gonna make you my main squeeze one day, bro. save the date.

    crunch 8 hours 36 min ago view
  • In this instance, yes, I care more about the result of this big thing that isn't really a big thing.

    #crunchsplaining

    #willlistentojeffsullivanmorethanyou

    #blessyourheart

    #hitler

    #tcrmartyr

    #billyhamiltonwar

    #baseballtalk

    Tito 8 hours 37 min ago view
  • Two things:

    Fangraphs WAR #s include baserunning and Hamilton is elite at that. He leads in SBs with the 54 and and has an 87% rate which is really good. I'm sure once he gets on base he's able to take the extra base quite often too. Both those things will up his overall WAR value.

    The differences between BR and FG WAR is pretty well documented online and thus If there are discrepancies it's fairly easy to figure out why. It's fairly well accepted that BR WAR is fine as a snapshot but FG is better at predicting future value.

    johann 8 hours 41 min ago view