Matt Holliday, Bill Buckner and Steve Bartman Star in "Droppin' The Ball".

(Click on image for the full size drawing)

Well...again, kinda mean. But right or wrong these guys'll be linked by post season blunder and playoff disaster and high pressure fumbling.

Maybe if they had a pr department and some Hollywood agents, they could have fun with it. Create a tv show called "Droppin' The Ball" with writing about the scale of "Two And A Half Men". And throughout the show, they just...drop stuff.

Matt: What happened to Rhonda?

Bill: Your girlfriend?

Steve: Don't you remember - you dropped her!

(LAUGHTER)

Matt picks up his cell phone, drops it. Looks to audience.

(LAUGHTER)

He dials.

Matt: Rhonda? Hey it's Matt. Listen about the other night I...Rhonda? RHONDA?

Steve: She hang up?

Matt: Nah, phone company dropped the call.

(LAUGHTER)

Enter the dog, LEON.

Leon: WOOF!

Bill: Leon! Leon catch!

Bill picks up a rubber dog-bone, tosses it to Leon. It goes between his legs.

Bill: Good boy!

(LAUGHTER)

You get the idea. Ron Santo can be the crotchety neighbor who lets out a yell every time something is dropped...Brant Brown can be the milkman with the signature "No use crying over spilled milk!" line. Always gets a laugh. Plus there could be a parade of minor characters coming through, depending on who "dropped the ball" that week. This week could guest star the ump that missed the fair ball call in the Yankee/Twins game, or even David Letterman.


Tim Souers is the illustrator and author of Cubby Blue and appreciates the opportunity to guest blog here at The Cub Reporter.
http://www.cubby-blue.com

 

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Comments

haha...quality cheese.

To be fair, Bartman actually caught the ball. Maybe it should be Alex Gonzalez instead. [Disclaimer: I love Alex Gonzalez, but he's the one who actually dropped the ball. I know there is a figurative sense to this, but it's well past time to let the Bartman thing die, and knowing in my heart that Alex Gonzalez is a good-natured wonderful human being, I think he would willingly throw himself on that grenade.]

Nope. Look again,

http://a.espncdn.com/photo/2009/1013/sn_a_sbartman...

Hey, does anyone know why all the Bartman videos have been flushed down the www memory hole?? I can find only one very low quality video left online.

Probably because MLB watches YouTube content like a hawk and makes them pull any videos that violate their exclusivity rights. They also caused all of the videos of Bill Murray substituting for Harry Carey to be taken down before I could download them.

It's not just that MLB is being a dick about it. The law requires them to aggressively assert their copyright or risk losing their rights altogether.

Without the Alex Gonzalez error they escape the inning. I don't recall it being a very difficult play, either.

None of these guys dropped anything. Buckner never even touched the ball. But I think there's still a hit show here. Maybe Holliday can play someone who tests products for safety with each episode featuring him, in full Cardinal uniform, being hit in the testicles by a series of products shot from a small cannon. It can be taped in front of a live audience of Cardinal fans who, instead of providing a laugh track, can, in unison, explain why they're the greatest fans in the all the history of great fans whose greatness at being fans is not matched by any fans anywhere.

With the Cards unlikely to sign him, where do we think Holliday will land?

http://www.chicagotribune.com/sports/baseball/cubs...

Who has a lot of money to spend and needs a corner outfielder? The Red Sox, Mets and Giants are the first three to come to my mind, though Holliday's poor play in Oakland might scare off AL teams. I have trouble seeing anyone besides New York or San Fran making a serious push.

Who has a lot of money to spend...
---
Who has the most payroll coming off their books this offseason? How can we find this out?

The Yankees have alot of money coming off the books this offseason.

Matsui 13 million
Damon 13 million
Nady 6.5 million
Pettitte 5.5 million

About 38 million in annual salary to work with.

Sayyyyy there is a home for Bradley. He wont be counted on to be the main offensive threat, and it should be fun to watch the Yankee fans heckle him until he explodes.

I will take Brett Gardner in exchange for paying any amount of Bradleys contract.

Hell the Yanks might be the only team willing to take his entire contract without us paying a dime in exchange for a bag of used jock straps. But I would imagine even the Yankees would want us to pay a large portion of it.

Yahhh... When you can't handle the scrutiny of Chicago fans and the grilling of Chicago sports media, you need to go to a more 'laid back' venue like New York. :)

Wait so because of one play St. Louis isn't going to try and bring back Matt Holliday? Ohhhh give me a break.

The Cardinals tend to spend money on sure bets and Matt Holliday hitting behind Pujols is a sure bet that they will try very hard to bring back. That offense and Holliday himself were awesome after the trade.

He has more of a chance of signing with St. Louis than any team in baseball. That franchise is great at retaining the talent they want.

I disagree. I don't see them spending $40M+ on two offensive players. This isn't the NBA.

I think after 2011 Pujlos is FA.

So I think they are saving their pennys for that.

I wonder what kind of contract Pujols will end up getting. If he waits until he hits the open market (at what, age 31?), I could see him getting something like 5/$125.

However, I doubt he's going to wait. I see him signing an extension with the Cards after next season and taking something along the lines of 5/100.

They just reported on WSCR that he not desperate to sign an extension this off season.

If he does it will be the greatest home deal discount ever.

Otherwise I bet he's in Boston come 2012.

I don't know - the home deal discount the Brewers got for Ryan Braun was unreal!

8 years/$45 million

I know nothing about being an agent, but I think I even could have gotten a better deal for Braun!

Those were club control and arbitration years. Only 3 years of free agency in there.

6 or 7 years at about $28 million per would be my guess. I think he (and his agent) will have already felt like they did the Cards a solid with his last contract.

I actually think the Yanks have the best shot at obtaining Holliday, and the crazy part is that they will still be shedding payroll while giving him a 19-20 million dollar a year deal. Damon and Matsui made a combined $26 million this year and will both be free agents. Holliday is an upgrade over both and would sadly represent a better financial bargain than those two. They still might bring one of them back at a reduced rate to be their DH, but the more I think about it, the more I am positive he is a Yankee. The Cards can't afford to pay Holliday $20 million a year for 5 years, when Poo-holes will be getting $30 million a year after next season. They just don't have the revenue for that.

some team is going to make a Soriano-like blunder signing Matt Holliday to a 6-7 year deal...good luck to them.

"I want [Brenly] to stay in the booth with Len Kasper, too; they're one of the two or three most entertaining and insightful teams around."

http://myespn.go.com/blogs/sweetspot/0-6-48/Cubs-m...

http://blogs.dailyherald.com/node/2743

My gut says Hendry will pull out the lasers again and land Jaramillo or die trying. Even though first baseman Derrek Lee expressed his feelings on the last day of the season that hitting coaches are overrated, Hendry doesn't believe that at all. Lee is talented enough to know his own swing, and Cubs hitting coaches have pretty much left him alone. But others such, as Ryan Theriot, Geovany Soto, Mike Fontenot and even high-priced guys like Soriano, fall into patterns that a coach can get them out of in a few days.

~grain of salt alert~
According to WSCR Terry Boers' "cubs insider", Rickett in no financial shape to "eat Bradley" contract.

With Bradley's suspension he can see scenerio where Cubs will not have a trade partner and that the Cubs will be forced to trade another player or two on their team to free up money to release Bradley if he can not be traded.

I would say this would be the worse case scenerio.

Jim Hendry is a moron.

Jim Hendry is a moron.

I really can't think of him butchering the situation anymore than he did.

how about eat Lou and Hendry's contracts and find some folks that will actually deal with the situation?

Yup, but I have a feeling the Cubs are going to be run like the Reds for the next couple of years.

I heard the interview too.

Grain of salt, but yeah.

As I stated yesterday, personally I think we are in for some shit for the next year or two.

We had the "window open", and the fucker got slammed on our fingers. Or Hendry's.

Basically, Boers said that the Cubs know they have to dump some salary, but they will not (obviously) be candid about it, and stuff will go down like it did for Marquis and DeRosa.

This wouldn't be too bad if there was really great talent to bring up. But according to AZ PHIL the other day, our better players are position players at AA, right? Not pitchers.

Demp should have a better year in 2010. He had so many off-the-field issues, that would mess with anybody. Lilly - how much longer can he have "career years"?

I'd rather Cubs management was just open about it and tell us they're going to rebuild. If they do that and get some good baseball people in there to rebuild the organization the right way I think you'd be hard-pressed to find a Cubs fan who would object.

And by "rebuild", I don't mean the team revolves around it's farm system... this is a big-market team and they should act like a big-market team, but it would be nice to turn out a legit hitters every once in a while and stop signing guys like... well everyone Hendry signed the 2009-2010 off season. I've said it before and I was laughed off: I don't think Hendry's job is safe, I don't give a shit what the Ricketts said before. Look at it this way: If the purchase of the Cubs still has to be approved by MLB you're not going to be running around talking about how you're going to rip up the front office.

Lilly - how much longer can he have "career years"?

Every year Ted doesn't pitch in the AL east might feel like a career year. =)

"I'd rather Cubs management was just open about it and tell us they're going to rebuild."

[ ]

"Look at it this way: if the purchase of the Cubs still has to be approved by MLB you're not going to be running around talking about how you're going to rip up the front office."

I would also imagine they aren't going to run around talking about how they are going to rebuild.

Point being if MLB and the GMs have to vote on the Cubs sale, you don't want to give the a reason to veto the deal. Don't rock the boat before the GMs vote, right?

As for rebuilding, teams do it all the time.

"Point being if MLB and the GMs have to vote on the Cubs sale, you don't want to give the a reason to veto the deal. Don't rock the boat before the GMs vote, right?

As for rebuilding, teams do it all the time."

The owners vote not the GM's right?

That said, it seems to me that all signs point to the ownership change being made prior to the winter meetings, so the new owner can announce his rebuilding plan after he is in fact the owner.

I guess I just don't understand all the rush.

Jay Mariotti column, September 21

With a new owner finally in place in Tom Ricketts, who hopes to pare a $140 million payroll by $40 million and create some semblance of a farm system, the time is right for a new front-office boss with fresh ideas to tackle the toughest job in baseball.

"...Tom Ricketts, who hopes to pare a $140 million payroll by $40 million..."

So what the hell is Mariotti's source for this piece of information? I wasted five minutes of my life on his column and found out he doesn't even cite the usual 'sources close to Ricketts,' etc. Shall I presume this idea is made up out of whole cloth?

They should file Mariotti under 'fiction' or 'fantasy literature' -- right next to the Twilight series.

His source is probably Phil Rogers...enough said.

owners already voted...Ricketts is just waiting for the bankruptcy proceedings and funding to finish it up...

• The rumored Milton Bradley-for-Pat Burrell swap makes sense from the Rays' perspective. "Bradley needs to go to Tampa Bay, someplace where there's no media,'' one GM said. But what does it do for the Cubs? "Burrell can't play the outfield anymore,'' another GM pointed out.

http://sportsillustrated.cnn.com/2009/writers/jon_...

article also says Rudy wants more than the $600K he got last year and could be looking for a managerial job...

"Burrell can't play the outfield anymore,"

Best pinch hitter ever.

I found this priceless clip on youtube...

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4KcGx99x_7I&feature...

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!

More like the Cubs every time I hear it!!

Reminded me of the grape lady making that strange throaty noise.

http://www.bostonherald.com/sports/columnists/view...

Red Sox like buy low, one year pitchers and wouldn't hesitate to do it again despite Penny and Smoltz last year...

But there are other choices, led by Rich Harden. A number of executives and scouts in the game maintain that Harden, who pitched for the Cubs last year, is a likely target of the Red Sox.

how about eat Lou and Hendry's contracts...
---
I hear there is a nice restaurant in LA that serves a dish that makes one diner feel like $30M bucks and the rest of the group fills up with TREMENDOUS gas.
---
“We knew we had to make the right choice. We knew we had to get the right guy. Not only did I come away [from the dinner] thinking TREMENDOUS things about him, but I also felt really good about him because as we left the restaurant and stood on the curb waiting for the driver, Milton said, ‘I know it’s going to take some time, but I want to tell you I want to be a Chicago Cub if you want me.”

He gave it up on the first date? Pfft.

per Rockie writer, Tracy Ringolsby: Jason Marquis wants to be a Met (he grew up in the NY area, Manhasset).
---
Jason Marquis...Has told former teammates his goal is signing with the Mets.

http://www.insidetherockies.com/2009/10/14/decsion...

lol, I predict much less success for Marquis at THAT place.

I had thought without a doubt, that Hendry was going to make a trade with the Mets last year as he is a Staten Island boy (and Little League WS hero).

Never did happen. Hendry got us nothing except saving the Cubs $ (unless you include a washed-up RHP).

What a nice trade that was for us.

Sinker ballers always find their way to Colorado, Arizona, or Florida eventually.

1 of 4 in LDS series...awesome, but still got my World Series winner.

Yanks over Angels in 7

Phillies over Dodgers in 6

Yanks over Phillies in 5

SI's Heyman claims Cubs are talking with Rudy and are willing to offer him $750k per year. Too lazy to go back and find the link.

here's the SI/Heyman link:

Several teams have shown interest in Jaramillo, but it is believed the Cubs are favored to land him.

The Cubs have been in contact with Jaramillo since he declined an offer to remain with the Rangers. Jaramillo is so well thought of that he is expected to receive a salary of about $750,000 with the Cubs...

http://sportsillustrated.cnn.com/2009/baseball/mlb...

and a Heyman tweet:

Cubs are in contact with rudy jaramillo about hitting coach job. it is believed he's likely to take the gig.

http://sportsillustrated.cnn.com/2009/baseball/mlb...

Bruce Levine's blog discusses Jaramillo too:

http://espn.go.com/chicago/columns/blog?post=45617...

Jaramillo told people close to him that he would like to go to a team that has a chance to go to the playoffs and win right away.

Recent comments

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The first 600 characters of the last 16 comments, click "View" to see rest of comment.
  • Sure, no marks and some inconsistencies in the witness's statements. But firing your gun into garage wall immediately after an argument and punching out your car window is still threatening and out of control behavior. There was certainly enough for MLB to think it warranted a 30-game suspension.

    Charlie 46 min 53 sec ago view
  • I'd prefer they be flexible with the closing situation depending on matchups. You're not really adding a lefty reliever if you use him strictly as a closer.

    Charlie 47 min 25 sec ago view
  • Stockpiling young talent isn't only for trading for someone like Chapman though. Even with an elite closer winning the World Series is basically a crap shoot so the key is to get to the playoffs as much as possible and not just mortgage everything on one year. Once you get there an elite bullpen certainly helps but the playoffs can be won by one hitter or starting pitcher getting hot (Murphy, Molina, Baumgardner) and a closer might not be able to stop that.

    johann 1 hour 11 min ago view
  • I'm also not crazy about press convictions. As the police report noted, there were no marks on the lady in question. There's a TMZ link (of course) to her police pictures, as well.

    I think the only way this trade goes real bad is if Cubbery intervenes and Chapman is suddenly bad for some reason.

    Old and Blue 1 hour 15 min ago view
  • I am right there with you closing in on 60.

    I don't care that much about "mortgaging" one player who is not only blocked by two guys, but is not ready to hit the majors for at least a couple years.

    There is no reason why this team, this year, can't have a real shot at something NONE of us have experienced.

    Further, I don't feel that even if they fall short that they have ruined their farm system.

    I have made my opinion clear here, with others, Warren was shit on the Cubs save one spot start.

    The E-Man 2 hours 44 min ago view
  • Trading for Warren, Warren sucking, getting Warren back for Chapman plus 3 prospects, sounds like Revenge of The Yankees on the former Boston executive. Old rivalries never die.

    I pray to the heavens above Chapman doesn't suck for some reason, or he'll be booed out of town faster than a Todd Hundley revival meeting.

    Old and Blue 2 hours 52 min ago view
  • I'm kind of nostalgic for the Schwarber-for-Miller rumors.

    Brick 3 hours 4 min ago view
  • This offseason, after some ridiculous playoff run and Chapman saving every game from here until the end of the postseason striking out 27/9innings, I welcome anyone to quote this thread and call me a dummy: I hate this trade, and my hate is 2 parts Chapman makes this team less likeable and 1 part that's a ridiculous overpay for 30 regular season innings and, at tops, 10 postseason innings. Already hoping they don't extend him.

    Charlie 3 hours 5 min ago view
  • btw...Thanks AZ Phil. I'm really enjoying your take on this trade.

    Cubster 3 hours 28 min ago view
  • I'm a bit disappointed on the Warren experience. Essentially they gave Castro away for crickets (OK, well they signed Zobrist with the Castro salary dump). Otherwise one might look at it as Chapman for Castro and our #1 minors prospect (Torres) + McKinney/Crawford. Seems pricey for a 2 month rental. We will see if this price tag is that steep in a relative way based on the remaining deadline deals for relievers.

    Cubster 3 hours 28 min ago view
  • Yep. One of the great things about this team (in addition to being really good at baseball) was the "likable" factor. Feels a bit different now. Who knows...maybe Chapman will be the king of the dance parties.

    billybucks 3 hours 37 min ago view
  • Here are some possible corresponding minor league moves we might see in the aftermath  of the Chapman trade: 

    SOUTH BEND to MYRTLE BEACH: OF Donnie Dewees and INF Bryant Flete  

    EUGENE to SOUTH BEND: OF Robert Garcia and INF Vimael Machin 

    There is really no reason to replace Billy McKinney at Tennessee because both Chris Coghlan and Jorge Soler are doing their rehab at Tennessee.  

    And there are plenty of pitchers at Iowa. No need to replace Warren at AAA. .  

    Arizona Phil 3 hours 57 min ago view
  • I am 70 years old. The Cubs last played in the World Series in 1945. I was born in 1946. I hate to lose a prospect like Torres, but when the opportunity is there to get that World Series ring, you go for it. This was the idea in stock piling all this young talent. I would like to see Reddick added now and the Cubbies should be done.

    Hagsag 4 hours 28 min ago view
  • I would expect Richard to accept an optional assignment because based on how he's played this season, there is a decent chance that he won't find work elsewhere. Rather stay and potentially get a ring. Same goes for Coghlan since he's struggled mightily this year.

    Edwards should not go down. He's pitched very well and Maddon is very impressed with him. I would expect Grimm to go down for Cahill so he can get back on track (he's pitched better in July, but he's not getting enough appearances).

    chitownmvp01 4 hours 31 min ago view
  • chitownmvp01: Indeed Clayton Richard would seem to be odd man out once Chapman reports, but Richard might accept a minor league assignment if he is promised a return to Chicago on 9/1 when MLB Active List rosters expand (Richard has minor league ioptions left).

    Arizona Phil 4 hours 34 min ago view
  • The only player in the deal that would cause me a second thought is Gleyber Torres.

    McKinney and Crawford are decent prospects but both are redundant/replaceable in the system and Warren was really only a middle-reliever or #6 starter, so to me it's really just Torres for Chapman.

    Arizona Phil 4 hours 55 min ago view