Alfonso Soriano and the Kaplan Conspiracy

LIfe is better when the Cubs win, but failure has a way of stoking a Cub fan's creativity, doesn't it? This dramatic reinterpretation of a call into David Kaplan's post-game "Tenth Inning" show is the work of WGN listener Edwardo, who was clearly inspired by Comedy Central's "Crank Yankers."

Comments

Wow. Kaplan isn't taking the canceling of Sports Central well.

No biggie. Kap wasn't very enjoyable after Tom Waddle left the show anyway. I do give him credit for airing a lot of Baseball Prospectus guys, though.

I also give him credit for having a panel of Cub bloggers on with him this past spring on Sports Central, including Andy from desipio.com, who has ripped on Kaplan often, enthusiastically, and to great comic effect.

To be honest, I can't think of another Chicago sports radio guy I would rather listen to than Kaplan. Except maybe Les Grobstein, and Les is a different kind of sports radio guy. In fact, I think he is another species altogether.

"To be honest, I can't think of another Chicago sports radio guy I would rather listen to than Kaplan."

Tall midgets are still rather short.

He should have gotten them on with Ruben Amaro. The Phillies just made a guy who has ranked 27th and 49th among offensive players over the last two years the NL's highest paid player. Chase Utley must be salivating.

Moly Holy, that's a big contract to a big man. What will Prince Fielder get in free agency now?

A lot of green, that's for sure.

Vegan joke!!

Now there's something I never thought I would see: The word "inspired" in the same sentence as Comedy Central's Crank Yankers.

Long hair on Kaplan. :) haha

ss theriot, 2b baker, 1b lee, cf byrd, 3b ramirez, lf soriano, c soto, rf colvin, p silva

lefty going tonight in Lannan...

Maybe they're just trying to find playing time for Colvin? It doesn't seem like the best way to do it, but the Cubs have a surprising surplus of everyday outfielders right now.

Seeing if he can hit lefties I guess.

Pretty small sample size.

I just read somewhere that Lannan is AWFUL against lefties. Lefties are hitting over 500 against him, and righties are at about 250...
I wish I remembered where I read that... Obviously Lou didn't read it...
P.S. Here it is...
http://mlb.mlb.com/mlb/gameday/index.jsp?gid=...

well if Lou read that, he'd play Fukudome, Colvin and Fontenot then today...

Wow. Just looked up his career splits:
in 1451 PAs by RHB: .257/.328/.384
in 463 PAs by LHB: .291/.357/.501

But the BABIPs are very different, .267 by RHB and .320 by LHB. How does that work when looking at pitchers? And the BB:K totals are more what you'd expect, 132:146 by RHB and 35:79 by LHBs, obviously LHB striking out much more frequently given the less than 1/3 as many PAs.

[Edit: He's really been rocked by lefties so far this year. Only 26 PAs, but .542/.538/.792 line for a 1.330 OPS. He's had reverse splits every year so far, which would seem to indicate the BABIP is the result of his pitching and not the result of luck.]

I was going to check Fangraphs for pitch types, then realize those are rarely accurate.

I believe Lannan's best pitch is his change-up, that tends to be down and in on a lefty in their happy zone, hence the troubles (possibly or it's just bad luck).

See how many breaking balls he throws Colvin I guess...

1. Nyjer Morgan, CF
2. Adam Kennedy, 3B
3. Cristian Guzman, 2B
4. Adam Dunn, 1B
5. Josh Willingham, LF
6. Ivan Rodriguez, C
7. Ian Desmond, SS
8. Willy Taveras, RF
9. John Lannan, P

Guzman batting 3rd, commence laughter

http://sports.espn.go.com/chicago/mlb/news/st...

Z says he was assured stay in pen is temporary until a trade can be made...

Z for Vernon Wells?

Har.

I wonder if Ryan Howard's new contract means that Hendry will let D Lee go after next year and try to swing a trade for Ryan Howard. I'm trying to think of an equally bad contract the Cubs have (scratches head).

you realize that scenario makes no sense. If the Phils wanted to move Howard, you don't sign him to an untradeable contract.

Oh, I know it doesn't make sense.

Makes no sense to me. I'd rather have Vernon Wells or Soriano under contract than Ryan Howard for 25 per year.

Probably at least a 10 million per year overpay.

http://www.cnn.com/2010/LIVING/worklife/04/24...

If Lackey misses any significant time due to surgery on a pre-existing elbow injury during the first five years of the contract, the Red Sox gain a club option for the 2015 season in which Lackey would have to pitch for the major league minimum salary.

among others...

Is it me or is Big Z showing signs of serenity now and insanity later?

Is it me or is Big Z showing signs of serenity now and insanity later?

He pitched well tonight - I am sure it's not really, but it seems like the first 8th inning of the year that we didn't give up a run.

Just 2.5 back now with 142 to play!

Hoochie mamma!

~ata boy, Lloyd!~

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  • Yeah, Underwood impresses the internet scouts more than the opposing hitters. Blackburn and Williams have pitched well but they would be more interesting if they missed more bats.

    Myrtle Beach has a couple of guys--Trevor Clifton and Jake Stinnett--worth keeping an eye on.

    South Bend has the best record in the Midwest League but it's more about their bats than their starting pitching.

    VirginiaPhil 20 min 22 sec ago view
  • Thanks Steve, I always forget about that.

    Rob Richardson 23 min 34 sec ago view
  • Maddon spins the wheel-o-lineups and Bryant is playing 1B.

    The line-ups, by the way, appear in the Twitter box on the left and usually very soon after they are made available.

    CTSteve 26 min 7 sec ago view
  • Looks like no Heyward or Rizzo in the lineup today.

    Rob Richardson 42 min 31 sec ago view
  • HAGSAG: Kevonte Mitchell has shown some improvement in 2016. He takes a lot of walks, shows occasional power, and he's an athletic defender capable of making the big play in the OF.

    However, he strikes out way too much, he doesn't always take the most-direct-route to get to balls hit into the air, and he sometimes runs himself into outs on the bases. He is still very raw.  

    Arizona Phil 43 min 1 sec ago view
  • E-MAN: I don't think Dallas Beeler has a long-term future with the Cubs, but (when healthy) he has gotten the call over the past couple of years as the "26th man" when the Cubs needed an extra starter in a doubleheader. 

    Arizona Phil 57 min 46 sec ago view
  • PHIL: Thanks for the wrap. A 2010 early-ish round Hendry draft pick, why do you surmise the new management team just doesn't cut bait on Beeler? Not shown that much as a starter. Does he have a power arm when right? Is he another Schlitter? Or, is he rosyer filler while the org waits out the lower-level arms to surpass him?

    The E-Man 1 hour 43 min ago view
  • Ryan Kellogg is still a fringy prospect despite being very old for low-A. He's putting up very good numbers no matter who he's facihg.

    John Beasley 5 hours 47 sec ago view
  • Great article on Yosh and Nobe. Thanks for including it Trans.

    Hagsag 5 hours 18 min ago view
  • Phil, it looks like Kevonte Mitchell has made some progress this Spring. Your thoughts please, thanks.

    Hagsag 5 hours 23 min ago view
  • so far ryan williams (AAA) is the only system prospect on the "could be ready soon" horizon doing well...that said, he's not very exciting and he's assumed to be an end-rotation talent at best.

    paul blackburn is getting great early returns in AA, but he's getting surprisingly low K numbers doing it. he throws lot of low/sinking stuff with good control...also assumed to be an end-rotation guy, but he's got room to be better, especially given his control as base to build on.

    crunch 10 hours 39 min ago view
  • Speaking of pitching -- another ugly outing for Underwood at AA. Through 6 starts: 5.19 ERA, WHIP 1.69. Yikes!

    Man, do we need starting pitching depth. Our best hopes are still hanging with AZ Phil in Arizona. Very scary.

    billybucks 11 hours 37 min ago view
  • jeebus... that's terrible.

    Ryno 12 hours 38 min ago view
  • *clap* *clap* *clap*

    Brick 14 hours 39 min ago view
  • Thanks AZ. If you like him, I like him.

    Old and Blue 15 hours 33 min ago view
  • Awesome report, and good to see Beeler on his way back.

    I'm also very happy to hear about the bi-level bump for Daniel Lewis. In the Name of Theo, he was the Last of the Full-Season Cuts, and There Will Be Blood for those who unnecessarily slow his development. Sure, he might end up in independent ball pitching for Lincoln. But if everything breaks right, he may even have a shot at joining up with the Gangs of Chicago. I wouldn't bet My Left Foot on it, though.

    John Beasley 16 hours 38 sec ago view