Alfonso Soriano and the Kaplan Conspiracy

LIfe is better when the Cubs win, but failure has a way of stoking a Cub fan's creativity, doesn't it? This dramatic reinterpretation of a call into David Kaplan's post-game "Tenth Inning" show is the work of WGN listener Edwardo, who was clearly inspired by Comedy Central's "Crank Yankers."

Comments

Wow. Kaplan isn't taking the canceling of Sports Central well.

No biggie. Kap wasn't very enjoyable after Tom Waddle left the show anyway. I do give him credit for airing a lot of Baseball Prospectus guys, though.

I also give him credit for having a panel of Cub bloggers on with him this past spring on Sports Central, including Andy from desipio.com, who has ripped on Kaplan often, enthusiastically, and to great comic effect.

To be honest, I can't think of another Chicago sports radio guy I would rather listen to than Kaplan. Except maybe Les Grobstein, and Les is a different kind of sports radio guy. In fact, I think he is another species altogether.

"To be honest, I can't think of another Chicago sports radio guy I would rather listen to than Kaplan."

Tall midgets are still rather short.

He should have gotten them on with Ruben Amaro. The Phillies just made a guy who has ranked 27th and 49th among offensive players over the last two years the NL's highest paid player. Chase Utley must be salivating.

Moly Holy, that's a big contract to a big man. What will Prince Fielder get in free agency now?

A lot of green, that's for sure.

Vegan joke!!

Now there's something I never thought I would see: The word "inspired" in the same sentence as Comedy Central's Crank Yankers.

Long hair on Kaplan. :) haha

ss theriot, 2b baker, 1b lee, cf byrd, 3b ramirez, lf soriano, c soto, rf colvin, p silva

lefty going tonight in Lannan...

Maybe they're just trying to find playing time for Colvin? It doesn't seem like the best way to do it, but the Cubs have a surprising surplus of everyday outfielders right now.

Seeing if he can hit lefties I guess.

Pretty small sample size.

I just read somewhere that Lannan is AWFUL against lefties. Lefties are hitting over 500 against him, and righties are at about 250...
I wish I remembered where I read that... Obviously Lou didn't read it...
P.S. Here it is...
http://mlb.mlb.com/mlb/gameday/index.jsp?gid=...

well if Lou read that, he'd play Fukudome, Colvin and Fontenot then today...

Wow. Just looked up his career splits:
in 1451 PAs by RHB: .257/.328/.384
in 463 PAs by LHB: .291/.357/.501

But the BABIPs are very different, .267 by RHB and .320 by LHB. How does that work when looking at pitchers? And the BB:K totals are more what you'd expect, 132:146 by RHB and 35:79 by LHBs, obviously LHB striking out much more frequently given the less than 1/3 as many PAs.

[Edit: He's really been rocked by lefties so far this year. Only 26 PAs, but .542/.538/.792 line for a 1.330 OPS. He's had reverse splits every year so far, which would seem to indicate the BABIP is the result of his pitching and not the result of luck.]

I was going to check Fangraphs for pitch types, then realize those are rarely accurate.

I believe Lannan's best pitch is his change-up, that tends to be down and in on a lefty in their happy zone, hence the troubles (possibly or it's just bad luck).

See how many breaking balls he throws Colvin I guess...

1. Nyjer Morgan, CF
2. Adam Kennedy, 3B
3. Cristian Guzman, 2B
4. Adam Dunn, 1B
5. Josh Willingham, LF
6. Ivan Rodriguez, C
7. Ian Desmond, SS
8. Willy Taveras, RF
9. John Lannan, P

Guzman batting 3rd, commence laughter

http://sports.espn.go.com/chicago/mlb/news/st...

Z says he was assured stay in pen is temporary until a trade can be made...

Z for Vernon Wells?

Har.

I wonder if Ryan Howard's new contract means that Hendry will let D Lee go after next year and try to swing a trade for Ryan Howard. I'm trying to think of an equally bad contract the Cubs have (scratches head).

you realize that scenario makes no sense. If the Phils wanted to move Howard, you don't sign him to an untradeable contract.

Oh, I know it doesn't make sense.

Makes no sense to me. I'd rather have Vernon Wells or Soriano under contract than Ryan Howard for 25 per year.

Probably at least a 10 million per year overpay.

http://www.cnn.com/2010/LIVING/worklife/04/24...

If Lackey misses any significant time due to surgery on a pre-existing elbow injury during the first five years of the contract, the Red Sox gain a club option for the 2015 season in which Lackey would have to pitch for the major league minimum salary.

among others...

Is it me or is Big Z showing signs of serenity now and insanity later?

Is it me or is Big Z showing signs of serenity now and insanity later?

He pitched well tonight - I am sure it's not really, but it seems like the first 8th inning of the year that we didn't give up a run.

Just 2.5 back now with 142 to play!

Hoochie mamma!

~ata boy, Lloyd!~

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  • Lackey finishes with a 3.35 ERA. Currently good for 13th in the NL. Not bad for a guy signed to be a #3 starter in a 15-team league.

    He is also 6th in WHIP. Pretty amazing: Cubs have the #2, #3, #5 and #6 starters in WHIP.

    billybucks 4 hours 7 min ago view
  • Completely meaningless game, but Pena striking out Sean the Turd to with the bases loaded was very fun.

    Other than one bad game in SD, Pena has been very good. Even with that game, 9.0 IP, 13 K, 0.89 WHIP.

    billybucks 4 hours 11 min ago view
  • 101 wins...most since 1910 (104).

    neat. ...or sad. pick one. pick both. 'murica.

    crunch 4 hours 27 min ago view
  • Just looked up Grimm's stats -- after a great run, he gave up 2 runs vs. MIL then didn't pitch for 10 days. Don't remember why?

    billybucks 4 hours 30 min ago view
  • Sean Rodriguez's helmet looks like it's taking a dump

    jacos 4 hours 34 min ago view
  • Grimm not doing himself any favors lately re: making the playoff squad. Seems to have lost the feel for his curveball.

    billybucks 4 hours 39 min ago view
  • j.grimm is literally worse than hitler.

    felix pena, your turn.

    crunch 4 hours 40 min ago view
  • it's been a while since joe's over-managed a game...it's gotta feel good for him to be back in the saddle making people's scorecards look like their pens blew up.

    crunch 5 hours 26 min ago view
  • Fuck a bench spot on the playoff roster, Coghlan is competing to bat cleanup.

    John Beasley 7 hours 42 min ago view
  • barely any...especially for an evening game. place looks 1/2 full at best to start the game.

    crunch 8 hours 4 min ago view
  • Listening on the radio. Are there any fans in the stands at all?

    Brick 8 hours 13 min ago view
  • "An MRI taken Monday on the right side of Jorge Soler showed no major damage."

    crunch 9 hours 14 min ago view
  • rare air though if he can keep it under 2. Sounds like Maddon already made up his mind though and Hendricks seems like the sort that would want to earn it. Guessing he gets a quick hook if he's still under 2 after 5 innings.

    Fwiw, he can give up 1 ER in 5 innings (or more) and still be under 2. If he gives up 2 ER, he would need throw 9 IP to keep it under 2. 1 ER in 4 IP would give him an ERA of exactly 2.

    In terms of WAR, it's still Scherzer by a lot (6.4), then Cueto (5.6), Lester (5.5), Kershaw (5.5), Roark (5.4), and then Hendricks (5.1)

    Rob G. 10 hours 28 min ago view
  • Boring lineup tonight in terms of guys trying to reach milestones -- no KB (40 HR), Addy (100 RBI) or JHey (can he keep it going?), and Lackey isn't really going for anything, plus the team has already reached 100 wins. I get the "rest" thing, although they will have 4 days off after Sunday, but....bleh.

    billybucks 11 hours 12 min ago view
  • Agree -- I think you want to keep him on a regular schedule.

    billybucks 11 hours 32 min ago view
  • Ramos torn ACL

    jacos 12 hours 7 sec ago view