Lou Piniella: The Old Man and the Sea Monkeys

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THE OLD MAN AND THE SEA MONKEYS by Tim Hemingway, rough draft.

The old man shouted.

"How did I get here? One day I was in sunny Florida trying to catch a great fish, and now I am here with my Sea Monkeys who will not listen, will not execute, will not do what I say. And every day the reporters come, and they ask why, why do your Sea Monkey not listen, not execute, not do what you say?" 

Let us watch the team first said the old man without saying anything but rather by simply turning his head towards the play.

The Sea Monkey on first, he began running when the ball was struck, and the ball went to the Sea Monkey second baseman, who threw the ball to the wrong Sea Monkey, who threw the ball to the other wrong Sea Monkey, who was covering for another Sea Monkey, and the Sea Monkey on base ran on by, because there was no Sea Monkey at home.

The old man shouted.

"Why? Why did this happen? I have never seen or heard of such a play except when I was a young boy, playing with a mighty stick and weathered ball in the summer streets of my home town of Florida, sunny Florida."

Ahh, that's enough, and I apologize to the Ghost of Ernest for my blasphemy.

I got an email from the guy I split season tix with that said basically: do I want any tickets for the rest of the month since he doesn't plan on going and wants to put them up on Stub Hub before the value plummets further.

The point of this post, I think, is this: Lou should go.

When you're the leader and you have no answers, you should step down.

And when you can't fire the whole team, you should fire the manager.

Or as Hemingway once said, "This season is awful, and it's ruining my golden and frosty cold beverage and delicious hot dog with grilled onions and sport peppers and mustard."

 


You can read Tim Souers work on daily basis at Cubby Blue.

Comments

I think if Lou really cares about this team at all, he will want to fire it up. Running out to second base and kicking it won't do it, and he appears to be too tired to do that anyway.

The way to fire up this team, the dignified, cool way to do it, would be to say, "These guys are just a bunch of mopes who don't want to win, and I don't want to manage a team that doesn't want to win, so I am moving back down to Florida and see if I can buy somebody's Tampa Bay season tickets."

Has anyone heard anything about our favorite Mulerider and a contract?

I would have thought he couldn't sign fast enough since he was thinking day 2 of the draft.

Any word on anyone else they selected?

him and his adviser/agent probably have to re-evaluate his worth after going into this whole thing expecting to be a 2-5th round pick.

from the sounds of it the kid was surprised he was picked rather than expecting it.

I like the post...but I hate Hemingway.

i don't want the cubs to be the highest paid team in the league & i don't want the dumpiest most beautiful ballpark in the league to be the most expensive one to visit...everything has changed except the one thing...

The One Thing is a great INXS song.

Brilliant!

deep threat started for the i-cubs last night; here we go again?

Toyota sign...

Was at yesterday's debacle.

The bad: it's ugly and is definitely higher than in prior artist renderings. the only way to make it less ugly will be to put more signage near it that is even uglier. It doesn't block the Horseshoe casino rooftop ad because of the extra elevation (wasn't that the non financial part of the mission?)

The good: If we ever get a slugger to hit one thru the center of the sign, it's surely going to earn someone a million dollars as promised on the Horseshoe sign by hitting that too...now that would be cool! HR derby in the 2014 All-Star game, Rebel Ridling, your destiny awaits you.

up, no word on the corresponding move yet, I'd guess Randy Wells.

http://www.commercialappeal.com/news/2010/jun...

could be Gorzelany to be stretched in.

Gorz is out of options, so I have my doubts.

could be Howry being released or maybe Russell sent down as well.

You think Wells optioned or DL'd for some mysterious reason?

Wells hasn't been that bad. Zambrano has been worse.

I hate this season.

Wells ERA is up to 5.15, he's been shelled 3 of his last 4 starts and if he was out partying the night before after pitching like a crap over the last month, he probably deserves to be sent down.

Z should be fine, just stop dicking him around.

that being said, it could be Howry being released.

Bruce Levine on his Sat AM show confirms Atkins callup, says corresponding roster move will be announced in about one hour

(awesome Rob, you beat Levine and the press corp by 1/2 hour)

...and I'm thinking James Russell

posted on twitter by someone...

Jeff Samardzija made an emergency start for the Cubs tonight after scheduled starter Mitch Atkins was scratched during batting practice.

http://www.commercialappeal.com/news/2010/jun...

you have to read between the lines but the Iowa link was 11:25 pm and the more obvious Memphis link was posted at midnight

Sullivan says Russell likely to go to Iowa ( not confirmed yet)

http://chicagocubsonline.com/archives/2010/06...

CarrieMuskat: #Cubs lineup for sat is 2b riot, 3b baker, 1b lee, cf byrd, rf nady, lf sori, c soto, ss castro, p silva

Recent comments

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  • been like that everytime I've been there too including Jack Murphy/Qualcomm Stadium. Cubs travel well. It was pretty loud for Angels/Cubs this year and decent for Dodgers/Cubs but Dodger fans definitely turn out better than the Padre fans.

    Rob G. 3 hours 14 min ago view
  • When I went in the 2007-2008 range, it was at least 75% Cubs fans.

    blockhead25 3 hours 27 min ago view
  • Jeff Sullivan on Kris Bryant's lack of clutch hitting in 2016. Very good stuff, unsatisfying conclusion (it's probably random).

    http://www.fangraphs.com/blogs/the-one-problem-wit...

    John Beasley 3 hours 28 min ago view
  • I was at Tuesday's game in San Diego. It looked like half of Chicago was at Petco. We were much louder than Padres fans.

    BobbyD 3 hours 29 min ago view
  • We may have a chance to catch one in October. Although hell, I couldn't deal with my co-workers if we lose to them.

    blockhead25 3 hours 48 min ago view
  • think I have to miss this series too (also was at the Arrieta game last year). But in my case, just had a busy weekend with work and kids have a bunch of activities and we made it to Opening Day in Anaheim and a couple of games in Wrigley this year which we normally don't get too...so not feeling like I'm missing out this year.

    Rob G. 4 hours 1 min ago view
  • they're awful

    Rob G. 4 hours 3 min ago view
  • I hope the Cubs play three good teams.

    Jackstraw 4 hours 5 min ago view
  • First year I'm not going to a Cubs/Dodgers game in a long time. 4 month old baby kinda changes plans around. But the no-hitter I was at last year can last in the memory banks for awhile.

    I think Dodger Dogs are awful. I love hot dogs, but those are crap.

    blockhead25 4 hours 40 min ago view
  • ayyyy...get a doyer dog, then.

    crunch 5 hours 8 sec ago view
  • I'm going to be at this one! Am told a Dodger Dog is just a long hot dog. Disappointing.

    Charlie 5 hours 2 min ago view
  • If my math is correct, if the Cubs play .500 baseball for the rest of the season, they will finish with 99 wins. I only just confirmed through Baseball Reference that 97 wins last year (and 2008) were the most Cubs wins in my lifetime. I think that last year while Arrieta was pitching better than Cy F. Young I didn't really get or appreciate what he was doing. I'm trying to try to grasp in the moment just how fucking remarkable this season is.

    Jackstraw 5 hours 54 min ago view
  • This is awesome.

    https://twitter.com/JeffNuich/status/769227069788131329

    (CSN Chicago will air Vin Scully's call of the Sunday Cubs vs. Dodgers game...well for an inning at least)

     

    Rob G. 6 hours 53 min ago view
  • I figured this was going to be the most meaningless regular season in Cubs history...and it is pretty much on point, although I certainly didn't think we'd have close to a 14 game lead.

    But, one bad hop in game 1 in October could change absolutely everything we will remember about this year.

    blockhead25 7 hours 31 min ago view
  • oh he's great, there's like 10 great pitchers in the NL right now that can flat out dominate though. Picking #2 (behind Kershaw) doesn't matter much to me right now. Much like whom the Cubs will play in the playoffs won't matter much, they're gonna be good teams.

    Rob G. 7 hours 44 min ago view
  • The Cubs great pitching has a lot more to do with their great defense this year and plenty of good luck  (#1 in ERA, #4 in FIP behind Nats, Mets and Dodgers with a rather ridiculous .258 BABIP against Cubs' pitchers).

    Cubs pitchers do strike out more hitters than Giants pitchers and do walk more hitters than Giants pitchers so that's a few more balls in play. Cubs' pitchers actually have a higher groundball rate though. Crawford is just really good and baseball happens.

    Rob G. 7 hours 46 min ago view