Roger Clemens indicted for allegedly being a big fat steroid-taking liar!
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If you were a baseball player, there are words and phrases you just don't want in the same sentence as your name. Words and phrases like: "federal grand jury", "indicted", "lying to Congress", and of course, "steroids" and "growth hormone".
And yet there it is: "A federal grand jury on Thursday indicted seven-time Cy Young Award winner Roger Clemens for allegedly lying to Congress about using steroids and growth hormone."
There's an old joke I've never told out loud because... well, I'm terrible at telling jokes. But I found it online:
A Scottish old timer in Scotland, in a bar, talking to a young man.
The Old Man says, "Lad, look out there to the field. Do ya see that fence? Look how well it's built. I built that fence stone by stone with me own two hands. I piled it for months."
"But do they call me McGreggor-the-Fence-Builder? Nooo..."
Then the old man gestured at the bar. "Look here at the bar. Do ya see how smooth and just it is? I planed that surface down by me own achin' back. I carved that wood with me own hard labour, for eight days."
"But do they call me McGreggor-the-Bar-builder? Nooo..."
Then the old man points out the window. "Eh, Laddy, look out to sea...Do ya see that pier that stretches out as far as the eye can see? I built that pier with the sweat off me back. I nailed it board by board."
"But do they call me McGreggor-the-Pier-Builder? Nooo..."
Then the old man looks around nervously, trying to make sure no one else is paying attention.
"But ya fuck one goat..."
This the exact same story that Roger wrote for himself with his own actions and mouth.
Now, his nickname won't be as simple as McGreggor's.
It'll probably have a bunch of asterisks and hyphens, wouldn't you think?
You can view Tim Souers work on a daily basis at Cubby Blue.
CUBBIES-4-EVER: It's not ten days including the day the player was Designated for Assignment, it's ten day from the day the player was Designated for Assignment.
So because Neil Ramirez was Designated for Assignment on 5/21, the deadline to either assign the player to another club (MLB or minor league) or release the player is 5/31 (today).
AZBOBBOP: No updates.
Phil, any updates on eight Oscar de la Cruz or Luis Hernandez?
One miscommunication in outfield and the Cubs would have another no hitter
Bruce Levine [email protected]
Sex Fowler out with sore heel
Pretty epic nickname
Mike Olt lives!
Screw the closer.
He's had so few save opportunities that it might be difficult for him to get the All Star nod but Rondon has an absolutely ridiculous 1.05 ERA and 1.06 FIP after this game so far (and I think his worst outing was in the 10th inning non save situation) so I do absolutely think he is worth considering.
wood(4)/grimm/strop/rondon combine for 7ip 0h 0bb 8K
3ip 0h 0bb 3k for t.wood...nice.
wonder if they'll let him go another.
4ip 0h 0bb 4k...and probably done f'real this time. 43 pitches and in line for the win.
And stay off the keyboard too
Depends how long he'd be gone but if not too long I would assume they'll use Wood or Cahill and limit them to 4 or 5 innings and call up a reliever to use in the bullpen.
hopefully it's a carlos-zambrano-special and he just needs to drink more water and less coffee+redbull before starts.
Assuming Hammel needs some DL time for the hammy, who do the Cubs call up: Glasnow or Taillon? Too many starting pitching prospects at Iowa to choose from.
"cramping in right hamstring" according to the booth.
btw, it was his left hamstring that was injured last year.
hammel is injured and done..."leg cramp" or some other leg issue...was down behind the mound coming back from commercial and seemed to have injured himself warming up on the mound between innings.