Toiling for the P-Cubs

Dear Randy -

You could do a lot worse.

I bet you didn't know that Forbes Magazine ranked Des Moines the #1 city in America for young professionals. And you gotta be the only one around here pulling down $2.7M per annum. You should get out more and explore. That's probably advice you're not used to getting but since you may be here for a while...

There's much more than the Court Avenue entertainment district. Broaden your horizons.

Have you been out to the Des Moines Art Center to see the Jackson Pollock display? Hard to believe his "Mural" is supposedly worth more than a Powerball jackpot but one man's doodling is another man's masterpiece, apparently.

Speaking of art, there's the sculpture garden right downtown that's drawn rave reviews since it was installed a few years ago. The annual Art Festival is the last weekend in June and it too ranks very high nationally. It's a great place for trolling, and so is the Farmer's Market down near the ballpark on Saturday mornings if you're up in time.

Are you into golf at all? We host the stop on the Senior Tour that's voted #1 every year by the players. That's probably not your style. Let's see, what else...

There's RAGBRAI, the Tour de Iowa in July when thousands bike across the state en masse, from the wide Missouri to the mighty Mississippi. It's quite a tourist attraction; lots of church ladies pie, homegrown corn on the cob, lemonade and drunken trysts between strangers who never meet again; that sort of thing. But your work schedule won't allow for that I don't suppose.

Looks like you pitched a solid six last night in Fresno and got that ERA down below seven. Maybe Volstad's oblique will get bent out of shape and you'll get recalled back where you feel you belong. Or Samson, I mean Deep Threat, will get a haircut and lose a few mph/games. There are lots of possible scenarios that put you back at Wrigley where you threw that gem to kick off the Memorial Day weekend in 2010. Remember? That game against the Cardinals when I was halfway to Chicago before I realized I forgot the tickets and, long story short, scrambled into my seat right before the anthem, just in time to see you soil yourself and leave without recording an out.

I just hate to see you suffer while you're stuck here pitching in purgatory.

Ever played cribbage?


drunken trysts between strangers who never meet again; that sort of thing

In Iowa... who'd a thunk it.

"...Honey, we're going to vacation in Des Moines this year... I want to see the art display by that Phillip Jackson guy. We'll leave as soon as all the snow in Iowa melts. Another three weeks should do it."

"drunken trysts between strangers "

They don't brand the cattle in Iowa?


tats & computer chips?

In Pella we considered Oskaloosa as sin city. BYOB tho...

in pella, des moines is sodom AND gomorrah!

Fuck all that shit, Ottumwa is where it's at.

An unfortunately all the Cubs will be healthy this year

Bryce Harper's high five puts DeRosa on DL

"Fist pounds for safety next time, Mark. Fist pounds for safety."

I'm not sure if getting fisted by Harper would help anything.


"Nobody has gotten greater value against pitches on the outer-third of the strike zone, or further away, than LaHair."

that is a horrifying chart. unless you're vlad, stuff like that rarely works out. it's a testament to both his power and quality of contact...and a bit of luck.

With a .510 BABIP, it's a helluva' lot more than a "bit of luck."

fwiw...j.heyman claims the cubs are more interested in keeping/extending garza (and working on it) rather than seeking a trade partner.

Recent comments

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  • Yes, cheers to me! I've noticed a fairly strong correlation between my tenure and Cubbie victories. 

    And thanks to Michael for our new diggs--and to y'all for sticking around! 

  • CHEERS to CT Steve for keeping this alive in 2015. Who would have thought that the season would have been so successful to this point? Thank you CT STEVE!

    I think I may be too nervous to watch the entire game. I will probably watch in bits and pieces - and constantly check MLB App. I will be like Blockhead: Nervous Nellie.

  • You can't prove the performance is because he played the OF. You just can't. Sorry.

    BTW, Bryant hit .168 in July playing 3B exclusively.

  • oh man, early on it seems like he made at least 1 stupid baserunning blunder per game and almost every single one turned into a positive for the cubs. it was magical.

  • Not surprised about Lester but bit surprised about Hendricks. Guessing that if something happens to Arietta right away they go to Lester but if they've burned relievers and are in extra innings they go to Hendricks.

  • My kids' 8:30pm (ET) bed time will be waived tonight (They are Rizzo & Castro fans). We'll get geared up in our Cubs apparel and will watch this as a family. I am stoked. Go Cubs!

  • Bryant: Base running adventures.

  • Remember Bryant's home-away splits, too.

    Wrigley: 21 HR, 59 RBI, .311/.408/.629
    Road: 5 HR, 40 RBI, .243/.333/.360

  • Good Lord this season has flown by so far. I need more Cubs gifs--the four on the article today are not enough. I need a 100 best moments of the season listicle of gifs.
    Rizzo: The slide, the catch.
    Russell: All the defense.
    Bryant: Pelting the video board.
    Soler: 125 MPH ground balls.
    Schwarber: DINGERS, surprising LF catches.
    Fowler: Walks, the many walks he should have had on 3-2 BS strike calls.
    Baez: That 3B play.
    Ross: Walk-up music? Bullpen appearance?
    Denorfia: Walk-off.
    Castro: Walk-offs.

  • No evidence other than 8 hits and 0 HR in 45 AB....

    I just think hitters like their routines -- think Boggs or Ted Williams -- and messing with that routine adds an element of change. I want my best hitters in their normal routines.

  • evidently i was busy burying context and meaning.

    i was excited about this playoff season kicking up in the drama of that environment, but it was stated insanely muddled.

  • Woke up early and couldn't get back to sleep in excitement/anticipation. Go Cubs Go!

  • The only issue with this dead horse is that there's no evidence that his performance during those games is solely due to playing the OF. I would tend to agree that I'd rather see him play 3B, though.

  • What do you mean by new format in this instance? The second wildcard team with a one-game playoff has been around since 2012.

  • Doubled over with anxiety today. GO CUBS.

  • Illuminati.