Game 34 Recap: Cubs 0, Reds 9
This Ain't Pleasure.
W - Volquez (5-1), Mascots and umpires getting injured in funny ways
L - Lieber (2-2), 3+ hours of my life
Things to Take from This Game
1. The Votto (and many others) Game.
Here is a list of Reds starters who did not hit home runs: Patterson, Griffey, Encarnacion, and the pitcher, Volquez. Joey Votto was the worst at not hitting home runs, as he failed to not hit home runs three times, against three different pitchers, to three different parts of the ball park.
2. Lieber? We barely saw 'er.
Lieber was terrible in his first start of the year. The second inning featured four home runs, to Votto, Dunn (back to back), Bako and Hairston. Just didn't have much in the way of stuff, with spotty command inside of the strike zone. It's not like Marshall or Gallagher were any better in relief
3. Can't Hit Volquez.
Volquez issued four early walks (and a couple late ones), but the Cubs couldn't hit him and he settled in after the first couple innings. Ten K's through seven, no runs, four hits.
4. Dusty, Dusty, Dusty....
What an idiot! Here we have one of the most talented young pitchers in the game, part of our core for the next several years, and with a 9-0 lead, and it's raining, and he's thrown 90-plus pitches, Dusty lets him come out for the seventh? With a rested bullpen? And there isn't even anyone up at the beginning of the inning, in case he struggles? What is he thinking? You're telling me there isn't a reliever who can cover a 9-0 lead for three innings? Of course, the young stud struggles through the inning, is painfully, clearly, visibly tired, and needs pitch number 118 to finally get through the inning??!?!
Oh, wait. Dusty is the Reds' manager, now? Nevermind.
5. Did I mention it rained?
And there was no one at the park, and it was deathly silent. What a wretched game to watch.
The all wet details, below.
- Comedy Gold: Reds Mascot, some man with a big baseball head, is being driven around the warning track on a four-wheeler. He falls off, smacking the ground with his big mascot head rolling off. Oh my god, you've decapitated Mr. Red! After staying down for a bit, the man beneath the mascot wound up being ok.
Inning 1 - Top
- Johnson grounds out to SS. Looks like it's a very windy, bright day at GAB
- Theriot bends backwards on a high tight fastball, for a 3-0 count. Walks on the next pitch.
- Lee grounds one to Encarnacion's left. He makes a nice grab and throw to second, Phillips stays in there with Theriot right on him, and turns the DP. Nicely done, but inning over
Inning 1 - Bottom
- Lieber makes his first start of the year, and immediately puts Corey in an 0-2 hole.
- 0 - 3. Corey strikes out swinging.
- the second half of the Dusty Daily Double, Jerry Hairston, gets sawed off, but dumps the ball right on the start of the OF grass on the left-side hole. Weird little base-hit. Theriot bare hands it and throws it to Lee, anyway, for no good reason.
- Griffey flies to Pie.
- Phillips bounces out to Theriot. Inning over
Inning 2 - Top
- Ramirez fouls out to first.
- Fukudome dribbles one towards first. Votto with a nice glove-hand shovel to Volquez, just beating Fukudome to the bag.
- Soto walks on five pitches.
- Cedeno flies out to center.
Inning 2- Bottom
- Votto cranks one out to RF on some sort of cutting pitch inside
- Immediately followed up by a very similar HR to Dunn. 2-0 Reds. That was quick.
- Encarnacion pops to Cedeno. Couldn't figure out where he'd hit hit, finally sees that he's popping out, heh.
- And Bako hits one out. This one more down the RF line. Three consecutive HRs by left-handed hitters
- When Volquez singles to center, Rothschild calls the bullpen.
- Lieber breaks Patterson's bat on a foul ball, lol. 0-2 count. Goes fastball upstairs for the third pitch (surprise, surprise) but Corey's check swing accidentally fouls it off
- Corey K's looking, fastball outside corner. Poor Corey.
- Hairston pulls one down the left field line, two-run homer. 5-0 on 4 HR in the second inning.
- This, this is not good.
- Griffey grounds a single into the shift. Cedeno playing way out in RF couldn't get to a weak single towards second.
- Phillips bounces into the 6-4 force, ending the inning
Inning 3- Top
- Pie up, Fontenot on deck. Lieber won't get a chance to hit.
- Pie swings through a high slider, strike three.
- Fontenot walks.
- Johnson knocked down on a fastball that was almost a high strike.
- Johnson strikes out swinging at a slider.
- Theriot bounces one through the right-side hole.
- Lee bounces one off of Volquez, but it deflects to Phillps, who makes the force at second.
Inning 3- Bottom
- Fontenot is in on a double switch. Cedeno moves to shortstop and Theriot leaves the game. Marshall in to pitch.
- Marshall walks Votto on four pitches. This could be a long day...
- Where'd the sun go? It's now very overcast at GAB
- Votto steals second, with Soto airmailing the bag. BJB says that the swipe was on Marshall, as Votto had a running start. Votto can't take third on the bad throw.
- Dunn K's swinging.
- Encarnacion walks. Two walks this inning for Marshall
- Bako pops to center.
- Marshall K's Volquez, swinging.
Inning 4 - Top
- Ramirez rolls one through the middle, to the left of Keppinger, for a hit
- Fukudome pops to Hairston.
- Soto walks
- Len observes that GAB seemed to have run out of fireworks by the time Hairston hit his. Anyone help him out, and recall if they launched fireworks for the fourth home run in that inning?
- Cedeno battles when down in the count, but K's swinging.
- BJB with the Pie/Patterson comparison, and as he makes it, Pie K's swinging.
Inning 4 - Bottom
- Patterson down 1-2. Pops to the pitcher's mound, where Ramirez catches it.
- It's starting to rain. Maybe Poseidon will take mercy on us, and drown the Reds out in his mighty, frothy waves.
- Hairston grounds out to SS.
- Griffey flies to shallow center, inning over
Inning 5 - Top
- Fontenot takes strike three on a fastball that catches the inside corner
- and Johnson K's swinging at a slider. Four straight K's for Volquez. So much for dragging out the inning in hopes of rain.
- Marshall lines a nice single past the diving Votto.
- Lee singles to left
- Ramirez K's, swinging, and Volquez strikes out the side. It's an official game
Inning 5 - Bottom
- Phillps smokes a slow curve from Marshall down the left field line, into the upper deck. 6-0.
- Votto hits one out to center. Another set of back to back HRs. 7-0.
- Dunn walks.
- Gallagher in for Marshall.
- Encarnacion pops to the pitcher's mound, Gallagher has to catch it.
- Bako bloops one down the left field line, just fair, for a single.
- Volquez sac bunts to Lee, Dunn and Backo advance to 2 and 3.
- Guess who's down two strikes?
- Fontenot makes a nice stop on a Patterson grounder, to get out of the inning
Inning 6 - Top
- Fukudome flies out to Patterson
- Soto K's swinging. He had been having some control issues earlier, but they now seem to be gone.
- Cedeno flails at a tough slider, taps it back to Volquez, who slips, but throws to just beat Cedeno at first. Quick inning, Cubs look like they're trying to get out of town ASAP
Inning 6 - Bottom
- Hairston flies to Fukudome.
- Griffey goes 3-1.
- Phillips inside-outs one inside the first base line, for a single. He did something to himself running to first, slows up, and trainer comes out to look at him. Stays in the game
- Votto homers to left-center, over the 379 sign. He's now hit three HRs to three different areas of the ballpark and against three different pitchers. 9-0.
- Dunn walks
- Encarnacion singles. Dunn to second.
- Gallagher K's Bako, swinging, to end the inning
Inning 7 - Top
- Phillips leaves the game for Freel. However, Volquez, up 9-0 in the seventh, with it raining and having thrown about 95 pitches, comes out for the seventh. I'm so glad Dusty is somebody else's manager, now.
- For the third time, Pie K's. Swinging on a changeup.
- Fontenot walks
- Johnson pulls one to Encarnacion, who throws a bit wide at second. Can only get one. Johnson to first.
- Ward bats for Gallagher.
- Ward walks. JUST NOW does a reliever get up in the bullpen, as BJB points out that Volquez clearly, visibly, is spent. He's thrown 116 pitches now. It's pretty funny to watch Len and Bob rip him.
- Lee K's, ending the inning
Inning 7 - Bottom
- Ward in for Lee, Howry in for Gallagher, DeRosa in for Ramirez
- Hatteberg, hitting for Volquez bounces to Fontenot
- Guess who's in a 1-2 hole?
- Well, that's kicking a guy when he's down. Corey comes back to single to right.
- As BJB predicted earlier, Hairston pulls a mammoth foul ball over the third base side. Nice.
- Hairston pops to Fontenot.
- Griffey dumps one into the triangle between CF, LF and SS. Corey to third.
- Good grief, I wonder what else is on.... Heh, Scrubs re-runs. The Todd is so funny, with his obvious double-entendres. hehehhe. Silly The Todd.
- Free grounds into a force, DeRosa to Fontenot.
Inning 8 - Top
- Hmm, I wonder if this potato chip I found on the floor is still good. Nope.
- David Weathers in, and Javier Valentin catching.
- DeRosa fists one to Votto, unassissted.
- Hey, Pokemon is on. Pickachu sure has a spunky personality. I wish he was my pet. I'd zap my neighbors.
- Has Fukudome always stood as close to the plate as he is right now? He seems more on top of it even than Reed Johnson.
- Fukudome finally gets a hit, legging out a single in the left-side hole.
- Blanco up for Soto. Flies to the warning track in left, with Dunn making a nice running, stretching catch over his head.
- Cedeno flies to right, again after a nice battle.
Inning 8 - Bottom
- Wuertz in. Gets Votto to ground out to short. Votto gets a standing O from the five people left
- Dunn strikes out, and Encarnacion flies out. Mercifully quick work by Wuertz
Inning 9 - Top
- Affeldt in to pitch.
- Pie grounds out to SS
- Fontenot walks. Third time.
- Valentin makes a half-hearted swipe at a pitch in the dirt. It gets past him, bounces up, and hits the home plate umpire right in the groin. It's funny on so many levels.
- Johnson strikes out swinging.
- Ward with a nice opposite field single. Fontenot to second
- Soriano in to pinch hit for Wuertz
- Soriano bounces to third, and Encarnacion steps on the bag, ending the game.
- Settling In
- Is Lieber done? (No.)
- Can Griffey play CF? (No.)
- Should we trade Soriano for Zito? (No.)
- Jessica Alba (Yes.)
- The sexiest trimester.
- Where's Neifi Now?
- The Dusty All-Stars
- Geriatric gay porn.
- Things Brenneman Hates.
- Is this game over? (No.)
- Who will be coming back to earth?
- Who is Stanley Tucci?
- By Brenneman's logic, Bako must be on the roids.
- Old people singing about dentures
- wanting to shave your cat's ass
- Cheering for rain.
- Can any good come out of this? (No.)
- Fukudome's home/road splits
- Why is Soto starting on a getaway day game?
- What's wrong with the Cubs?
- Letters to Gallagher
- Dusty leaving in Volquez
- Chad shows up. Hi, Chad!
- Chad leaves. Bye, Chad!
- Chad returns. Hi again, Chad!
- MLB.TV feeds.
- So bored, I rick roll myself.
- Oh dear lord
- Rally Caps
My recap record falls to 3-2, for the legions who care.