Spring Training Narratives: The Mad-Libs Edition.
I was meaning to write a nice update of spring training storylines like Rob has done in the post below, but I'm too busy
reading rejection letters from Universities being chased by spurned Valentines to scour the globe for the informative content that you, the reader deserve.
Then I remembered that it's spring training, and the stories write themselves.
So here are your Mad Libs that need filling in. The story itself is below the fold. (No peeking until you've entered your words!)
1. A Cubs Player
2. A number
3. A celebrity
4. A food
5. A gerund (a verb + ing)
6. A noun
7. A Cubs Player
8. A body part
9. A medical procedure
10. A number
11. A roster position
12. A Cubs Player
13. An adjective
14. A Cubs Player
15. An Adjective
16. A player from another baseball team
17. A sports reporter
18. A retired player
19. An adjective
20. A roster position
21. A feature of Wrigley Field
22. + 23. Two corporations
24. An occupation
25 + 26. Two Celebrities
27. A tragedy
28. A Cubs Player
29. A noun.
As spring training begins,  appears to be in the best shape of his life.  lost  pounds in the offseason by adopting  's fitness plan. This plan involves eating only  and a daily exercise routine of  .
 isn't the only Cub trying to get into mid-season form. Concerns about  's  linger. While  insists he will be ready to go on opening day, others fear that only  will fix the problem. Lou Piniella is relying on  to make at least  starts this year.
Wile most of the roster is settled, one of the top positional battles is for , where  appears to be the favorite but has to compete with more  candidates like . If no one steps up, General Manager Jim Hendry may be forced to sign or trade for a  veteran like . While  is reporting the rumor, Hendry says there has been no effort to coax  out of retirement and play for the team.
Finally, when the team breaks camp and heads for Chicago, expect some  new attractions. In an effort to boost revenue so that Hendry can sign more s, the Cubs have added advertising to the . The ads are specifically designed to fit in with Wrigley's historic ambiance. Among the prominent brands to be found will be  and . Also, a new host of celebrity guest conductors will find their way to the booth for the Seventh Inning Stretch. We don't want to give away too much, but expect to see legendary   perform, and  will be making his (her) first appearnce since .  is a self-professed fan, and hopes to ask him (her) for his (her) .
Brewers just claimed him
Before Wood,Strop, Rondon yesterday
Elias: 99 yrs. since a bullpen threw at least 7 perfect innings. last time 6/23/17 by Boston. Ernie Shore retired last 26 after Babe Ruth ejected for arguing balls and strikes after walking lead off hitter. Runner was caught stealing.
CUBBIES-4-EVER: It's not ten days including the day the player was Designated for Assignment, it's ten day from the day the player was Designated for Assignment.
So because Neil Ramirez was Designated for Assignment on 5/21, the deadline to either assign the player to another club (MLB or minor league) or release the player is 5/31 (today).
AZBOBBOP: No updates.
Phil, any updates on eight Oscar de la Cruz or Luis Hernandez?
One miscommunication in outfield and the Cubs would have another no hitter
Bruce Levine [email protected]
Sex Fowler out with sore heel
Pretty epic nickname
Mike Olt lives!
Screw the closer.
He's had so few save opportunities that it might be difficult for him to get the All Star nod but Rondon has an absolutely ridiculous 1.05 ERA and 1.06 FIP after this game so far (and I think his worst outing was in the 10th inning non save situation) so I do absolutely think he is worth considering.
wood(4)/grimm/strop/rondon combine for 7ip 0h 0bb 8K
3ip 0h 0bb 3k for t.wood...nice.
wonder if they'll let him go another.
4ip 0h 0bb 4k...and probably done f'real this time. 43 pitches and in line for the win.
And stay off the keyboard too
Depends how long he'd be gone but if not too long I would assume they'll use Wood or Cahill and limit them to 4 or 5 innings and call up a reliever to use in the bullpen.
hopefully it's a carlos-zambrano-special and he just needs to drink more water and less coffee+redbull before starts.
Assuming Hammel needs some DL time for the hammy, who do the Cubs call up: Glasnow or Taillon? Too many starting pitching prospects at Iowa to choose from.