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Coffee Shop Encounter with Jim Hendry
You may have noticed the The Sun-Times report that Jim Hendry was in Los Angeles and had dinner with free agent Kaz Matsui and his people last night. L.A. happens to be my neck of the woods and in one of those once-in-a-lifetime moments, I happened to run into Hendry while getting my morning coffee at the Coffee Bean on Pico/Smithwood in Beverly Hills. I couldn't resist striking up a conversation...
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(Busy coffee shop, about 6 people in line waiting to order. I stroll up and notice a older, Caucasian gentleman on his cell phone)
Hendry: I know Miguel Cabrera is good, but he's a righty, we need lefties. I think Kaz and Jenkins are the much better options, Randy.
(Hangs up phone)
Rob: Pardon me, are you Jim Hendry?
Hendry: (Surprised) Yeah, didn't think people would recognize me out here.
Rob: Well I'm a huge Cubs fans, how'd your meeting with Kaz go last night.
Hendry: How'd you know that?
Rob: It was in the papers this morning and I came across it on this fan site I read, The Cub Reporter.
Hendry: The Cub Reporter? No way. I read that site all the time, that Arizona Phil has given me a lot of good ideas.
Rob: Oh yeah, he's great, I like that Rob G. character too.
Hendry: Yeah, I think he's kind of a moron.
(awkawrd pause, I stare at the floor and scratch the back of my neck)
Rob: Um yeah, I guess so, he's nothing special...
Hendry: And if I ever get my hands on that ass who keeps making donut jokes about me, I'll freaking kill him.
(Hendry's turn to order comes up)
Hendry: I'll have a large extreme ice blended mocha, extra whip cream, two old-fashioned chocolate donuts and a scone.
Rob: So back to your meeting, how'd it go with Kaz? He probably wants to start somewhere and you guys are thinking more of a utility role, right?
Hendry: No, we're pretty sure we'll find him consistent playing time for him, our scouts think he brings the right mixture of speed and versatility.
Rob: But he's not good...
Hendry: Excuse me?
Rob: I mean, yeah, he's..he's versatile, but that doesn't mean he's, you know, good. It, it just means he's versatile, which is nice and all, but, you know Jose Macias was versatile, but he wasn't good. For example...if you have a moment?
(Hendry nods head while keeping a nervous eye out for his drink)
Rob: Like, Miguel Tejada , for example, is good, he can hit, but he can really only play shortstop and maybe third base, but he's actually, you know, good as compared to just versatile. And you know McPhail was a friend of yours, I'm sure you guys could work something out.
Hendry: Well our scouts really liked what they saw in Kaz and you know he's lefty and fast and can play a few positions and fills a role we need. And I'm a little pissed at Andy over that Trachsel trade.
Rob: Oh really, why so?
Hendry: He knows I have a weakness for good scotch and he sends over a bottle of his finest and by the end of the night he talked me into sending Moore/Cherry and that conditional pick over for him. Thank god Randy was there as I was ready to add Pie in as well if they added Corey Patterson.
Rob: Drunk GM'ing, never a good idea.
Hendry: (Laughs) Tell me about...some Crown Royal and I thought Juan Pierre was a good player.
Rob: (Awkard smile on my part) But back to Kaz, he's just not good. He only batted like 249 away from Coors last year with a 300 on-base percentage.
Hendry:(Growing agitated) Well stats can be interpreted in a lot of different ways. I know our scouts really like him.
Rob: There's nothing really to interpret, 250 with a 300 OBP is just not very good, no matter...no matter how you look at it. He's plain and simply not very good BUT I guess he's versatile...great.
That should put us over the top.
Hendry: If he doesn't hit like he did last year, we're certain that he can play a few infield spots for us and be a valuable guy off the bench.
Rob: Well maybe, but if you're going to give him a multi-year, multi-million dollar offer he's probably thinking he'll be starting most of the time and they'll be expectations on Lou's part to play him even if he's struggling, like he'll inevitably do because he's not very good. Not to mention....
(Hendry gets his coffee drink , can't leave fast enough but politely lets me finish my rant)
Rob: you're tying up payroll on a guy who's...at best, a marginal upgrade to your current shortstop and certainly a downgrade to your current second basemen and who should be a utiltyman off the bench, except you're probably going to pay him like a starter when you could easily fill his role with guys from the minors or cheap vets on a one year deal.
Hendry: (Polite laugh, ready to leave) You certainly have some interesting ideas, a lot like that Rob G. from The Cub Reporter that I can't stand, but I'm confident we're making the right moves and we'll bring the fans the championship they wanted. I've got to run though, some more meetings.
Rob: No problem, thanks for chatting with me and good luck this offseason. Who are you meeting with if you don't mind me asking?
Hendry: (walking out the door) I got a meeting with Neifi's people, we really like his versatility, speed and defense and then David Ecsktein and Jose Valentin. Got to run, go Cubs!!!
Rob: (Slaps forehead with open palm) Yeah later! (Under breath). Don't let the door hit you in the ass on the way out of Wrigley when Trib finally sells the team.
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Enjoy Thanksgiving everyone!!!
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