Dickie Noles
Revenge is a Dish Best Served in Formaldehyde
I can see the Simpsons animating this one (with a guest appearance from heaven by Ricardo Montalbán).
byline, Nick Cough-fart-doo and Kent Brockman:
The Red Sox announced the completion of the Theo Epstein compensation package today. The Cubs will receive as their PTBNL, the bone spur from Chris Carpenter's elbow in a jar of formaldehyde.
Would the Red Sox really refer one of their newest hurlers to (video link) Dr. Nick?
On a more serious note, it's not a good spring to be named Chris Carpenter. The Cardinals ace pitcher has a significant pinched nerve somewhere between his neck and pitching shoulder that has caused some weakness and discomfort. According to the St. Louis media his timetable to return to the Cardinals rotation isn't certain.
News broke out of Red Sox camp yesterday as fans were wondering why "the other Carp" had only thrown 2 innings all spring. Former Cub, Chris Carpenter tweeted:
“Headed into surgery tomorrow with Dr Andrews to remove a bone spur in my elbow,’’ “Stayin positive and prepared to work harder than ever to come back as soon as I can this season.’’
I'm Spur-ed on to write just a little more, after the break...
Update: (Thursday noon, CST), per a Carrie Muskat tweet:
RedSox send 1B Jair Bogaerts to Cubs to complete compensation deal for Theo. Batted .288 in Dominican Summer League. He's 19.
Recent comments
hellfrozeover (view)
I would say also in the bright side column is Busch looked pretty good overall at the plate. Alzolay…man, that hurts but most of the time he’s not giving up a homer to that guy. To me the worst was almonte hanging that pitch to Garcia. He hung another one to the next hitter too and got away with it on an 0-1.
crunch (view)
amaya blocked like 6-8 of smyly's pitches in the dirt very cleanly...not even an exaggeration, smyly threw a ton of pitches bouncing in tonight.
neris looking like his old self was a relief (no pun), too.
TarzanJoeWallis (view)
In looking for bright spots the defense was outstanding tonight. The “stars” are going to need to shine quite a bit brighter than they did tonight offensively though for this to be a successful season.
Eric S (view)
Good baseball game. Hopefully Steele is pitching again in April (but I’m not counting on it).
crunch (view)
boo.
crunch (view)
smyly to face the 2/3/4 hitters with a man on 2nd in extras.
this doesn't seem like a 8 million dollar managerial decision.
crunch (view)
i 100% agree with you, but i dunno how jed wants to run things. the default is delay. i would choose brown.
like hellfrozeover says, could be smyly since he's technically fresh and stretched.
anyway, on a pure talent basis....brown is the best option.
Childersb3 (view)
Use pitchers when you believe they're good. Don't plan their clock.
I'm sorry. I'm simply anti-clock/contract management. Play guys when they show real MLB potential talent.
If Brown hadn't been hurt with the Lat Strain he would've gotten the call, and not Wick.
Give him a chance.
But Wesneski probably gets it
crunch (view)
alzolay...bro...
crunch (view)
wow. what a blown call. go cubs, i guess.