Sunday Funnies: Tom and Theo meet for coffee.


This is actually kinda fun, isn't it?
Sure there's anxiety, but it's not like Cub Fans aren't used to that.
Or waiting.
Pretty soon Tom Ricketts will name a new General Manager, and who knows...
When Boston Red Sox principal owner John Henry said, "Theo (Epstien) is not going to be the GM forever," a billion Cub Fan tongues started wagging furiously.
It sure is intriguing.
But there are a handful of guys out there who would automatically upgrade the system just because they're skilled in the ways of modern stats.
Whatever ends up happening, as long as the Cubs don't do what the Sox did with their manager search, should be a reason for hope.

Happy Sunday and I hope you got a laugh.



Great stuff Tim.

I really truly feel more hope for the future now than I have in, uh, well a really really long time. And thanks.

One of your best pieces. Nice job! My hope is if Theo comes to the Northside that we don't have to take on more bad contracts (Lackey/Dice-K). Maybe John Henry likes bison dogs?

That could be a new t-shirt, Ricketts dressed as Darth Vader saying, "Come to the Northside".

loved this, Tim. The Tribune could use some animation to go with their columns these days. Paul Sullivan interviews someone who was an eyewitness to Theo on the way to your interview. Apparently Theo enjoyed a banana to go with his coffee.

Some guy thinks he sees Theo in a Starbucks. Then what? He calls Paul Sullivan to tell him the story? I actually did see Reed Johnson at OHare shortly before he signed. Next time I'm callin' Paul.

That reads like a really slow Onion article.

Tigers-Rangers postponed due to 60% threat of rain. Rescheduled to 3pm cst Monday. darn Tommy Skillethead.

Angels fire farm director too...

that's like 4-5 guys in the front office since they decided to blow it up. they should just cut the crap and make mike sciocia GM...he's the most powerful manager in the game even if he's not getting larussa money. hell, he practically is GM...the most gentle and nice "my way or stfu" guy in the game.

Yeah, that Angels farm system has really been slacking. I mean they only had what, two ROY candidates this year?

the whole blow-up was weird, imo...then again it's hard to do your job when mike sciocia thinks he's a scout, assistant GM, team president, and owner. hell, sciocia probably tells the cleaning crew how to sweep stairs in the nosebleeds. the weird thing to me is more than a few of these guys accepted re-organization roles rather than looking for a job somewhere else. evidently they're happy where they're at, but either the organization wants to go another way or they can't effectively do their jobs in the roles they used to have. ...or arnie is an impatient weirdo...dunno.

first Delmon Young, then this...Paper Tigers? Magglio O. off ALCS roster with broken ankle (no real details though).!/DKnobler/status/123133... confirmed by Heyman per rotoworld: Ordonez had surgery on the ankle late last year, and he hasn't been able to totally shake the soreness since.

This one is pretty funny, Tim! I like the extra emphasis on distortion of each of these guys, and their contrast. Reminds me a bit of Matt Groening's "Life in Hell"stylistically, which is what it feels like to be a Cub's fan sometimes.

STL faaaaaaaaaaail....holy crap what a 5th...quick as hell, too.

...and it just won't end... 5-8 stl/mil...6 run 5th, still no outs after a 2r HR.

via rotowurld via the miami herald via the department of "Well, no shi..." and the president of Duh... "The Marlins are interested in acquiring Carlos Zambrano if the Cubs pick up a large chunk of his salary next season."

Them and 26 other teams probably... or we could just hire Sandberg and have him straighten Zambrano out. I'd love to be a fly on the wall when Zambrano and Ozzie go at it for the first time, though.

in case anyone missed me...from a few days ago in the suntimes...article about cj wilson. in case you don't know much about cj wilson, yes, he's serious. ---- When the time comes, the gun enthusiast and part-time car racer said he’ll evaluate the Cubs according to several criteria. ‘‘Gun laws, day games, weather, competitiveness, freedom to be myself,’’ he said with a straight face. That’s, what, at least three strikes against the Cubs? ‘‘I’m just saying, that’s how I decide,’’’ Wilson said. ‘‘That’s the way my brain works.’’

That's awesome... if I played for the White Sox I'd damn sure get a carry permit. *Edit* I guess I wouldn't.

Wow. Guns are very important to this guy. Compensate much?


Comcast new england is also re-reporting the Sullivan article but says at the bottom that according to "sources" the Cubs have gotten permission to talk to Epstein (although the Redsox haven't said that publicly). My sources say Paul Sullivan is considering offers to take a job with TMZ. They have offered him the Brad Pitt gig. TMZ wanted someone with some baseball experience now that Pitt is a GM. Sully was last seen getting a banana and a grande mocha latte at a starbucks in LA to prepare for a dummy interview with Angeline.

If the Pitts are indeed hiring a dummy, Sullivan has probably got the job locked down. "Are you Theo Epstien?" "No, I get that a lot"..."Who is Theo Espstein?" If I was mistaken for a famous person frequently (maybe even once), I may fire up the old Google and take a look.

"No, I get that a lot"..."Who is Theo Espstein?" He's just showing that GM savy that gets you Dice K and Carl Crawford. /jedi mind trick

to prepare for a dummy interview with Angeline. --- visions of Sully sitting on Angeline's lap?

Delmon Young is back in the ACLS, takes Magglio's roster spot and is back in today's lineup.

I think we should start a pool - guess the day that Vitters's OBP (.364) in the AFL passes his batting average (.381). I'll take two weeks from Saturday

Please remind me, how does one get their OBP lower than their batting average?

Sac flies/bunts.

sacrifices BA: H/AB OBP: H+BB+HBP/AB+BB+HBP+SF in Vitters case: 8/21 = .381 8+0+0/21+0+0+1= .364

Just sac flies - sacrifices bunts don't go against your OBP. Getting on via error or fielder's choice or wild pitch doesn't help it. Personally I think wild pitches and errors should count.

olney tweet: Rival executive on Theo Epstein: "If he met with the Cubs, what it means is that if he gets the offer he wants, he's gone [to Chicago]." --- reminds me of a variation of F. Caliendo imitating John Madden: "It takes playing really good football to be a really good football player"

The team who scores the most runs usually wins.

Recent comments

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  • Cubster 44 min 8 sec ago (view)

    "in normal times..."

    It was the burst of times, it was the worst of times.


  • Cubster 53 min 52 sec ago (view)

    "Setting aside how stupid it is for fans to blame players when owners are all so much more..."

    I blame Pete Ricketts


  • crunch 11 hours 26 min ago (view)

    i can't believe this kind of stuff is what we're talking about 2 months into the 2020 season...i can't believe a lot of stuff about 2020 outside of the game, too.


  • crunch 15 hours 45 min ago (view)

    contract rights are retained by the team.

    in normal times this keeps labor relations between employer and player not too volitile with only a handful of player/owner issues.  in times like this you see a system that was not designed for an event like this.

    some owners are being responsible over the players who's contracts they control while other owners make us realize why the guillotine was occsasionally popular during revoltutions/revolts.


  • Jackstraw 16 hours 12 min ago (view)

    So they are all free agents?  Or still under contract and not getting paid?  I'm sure AZ Phil or someone else has covered this but I haven't been keeping up with all the fine points of baseball's problems recently.


  • Dolorous Jon Lester 18 hours 45 min ago (view)

    Manfred is such a dreadful commissioner. It's his job to walk a fine line and maintain peace in labor relations. Instead he lets the owners do whatever they want.

    Cannot wait for a long, bitter strike after 2021. And for the owners to ultimately turn plenty of fan sentiment against players.


  • crunch 1 day 11 hours ago (view)

    "The A's told their minor leaguers Tuesday that they will not continue to pay them their current salary of $400 per week beyond May 31."

    classy.  absolute class act stuff right there.


  • crunch 1 day 13 hours ago (view)

    Evan Drellich @EvanDrellich
    The MLBPA is very disappointed with MLB’s economic proposal today, source tells me and @Ken_Rosenthal, calling additional cuts proposed “massive." League offered to share more playoff revenue, but on balance, those dollars are small compared to what players give up, PA believes.


  • crunch 1 day 14 hours ago (view)

    A's are furloughing nearly all of their staff through the entire organization...including scouts, which make a shockingly low amount of money.

    the A's are owned by a multi-billionaire who inherited his loot from dad (founder of The Gap)...and him + family spent $10m trying to keep Obama from getting a 2nd term, which i assume is their idea of a good investment in their community...whereas paying loyal employees for years/decades for a few months is...well...*shrug*


  • Ryno 1 day 21 hours ago (view)

    Depends on who you are.


  • Ryno 1 day 21 hours ago (view)

    Sorry--Just needed to experience a little normalcy.


  • Ryno 1 day 22 hours ago (view)

    That was the dumbest lineup I've ever seen.


  • Hagsag 2 days 1 hour ago (view)



  • Cubster 2 days 18 hours ago (view)

    speaking of Trump's trained rats...


  • Hagsag 3 days 1 hour ago (view)

    Cubster, your comments about President Bone Spurs could not be more accurate. Thanks for posting!


  • BobbyD 3 days 12 hours ago (view)

    Cubster: I agree with your comments, save one. That the president is "leading" America. He couldn't lead a pack of rats to a NYC dumpster on an August afternoon. The "man" is a f'ing disgrace.