We Have a Winner

In a close vote to decide the Official1 TCR Nickname for our Middle Infielders, we can now announce that with 100% of the 66 votes counted, the winner is....

The Scrap Pack

The Scrap Pack beat The Tiger Cubs2 for the honor, and congratulations to all the other worthy suggestions as well.

Among the many virtues of The Scrap Pack are:

  • It rhymes
    • ok, fine, it doesn't.  Me flunk 2nd grad Inglish.
      • Ok, it has "internal rhyme."  I never got that far in English.
  • It's short
  • It has assonance
  • It has a sharp, staccato sort of meter to it
  • It alludes to a bunch of iconic womanizing singing drunkards with ties to the Las Vegas Mafia from the 1960s, who later went on to star in all-time classic movies like The Cannonball Run II.  
  • It is expandable: if necessary it could incorporate Reed Johnson, Aaron Miles and others.
  • Its origin is shrouded in TCR mystery and lore.  CT_Steve mentioned that he recalled seering someone use the nickname in Parachat, but we don't know who.

And most importantly....

  • If they wind up stinking up the field, we can always claim that the "S" is silent.

1 "Official" in the sense that part of my contract to begin writing for Ruz, years ago, included several legal prerogatives, including but not limited to the right to print Letters of Marque and to be keeper of The Official Seal of TCR.  I'm inferring from those prerogatives that I also have the right to declare things "official."

2 Yes, I just made an animal abuse pun.  I'm sorry.

 

Comments

Scrap Pack

For all its many virtues, I don't think it rhymes.

Heh.  I presently am designing final exams for college kids, and I don't remember what it means to rhyme.  What do the kids say these days?  Oh yeah, FAIL.

 Thanks for the catch there, I've updated the post.

I am still trying to figure out how Love & Rockets rhymed 'you' with 'you-ooh-ooh'.

Each person seems to have a different threshold for what 'rhymes' . The average rapper, for instance, wouldn't have any problem with rhyming those two words.

Yeah, I'm calling it a "rhyme," again. When me, Real Neal and "the average rapper" all agree, you know it must be correct.

 

And that's four consecutive comments by me relating to what counts as a rhyme.  I'll stop, now.  But god, I'd love to see a flame-war break out over poetry....  Come on, guys...

Trans, you ignorant slut, stand by your call! If it sounds like a rhyme to you, it's a rhyme! At the very least that is a slant rhyme; both words have the same short "A" sound on a stressed syllable and end with hard, aspirated consonants. Grow some balls.

And, fuck man, how did you miss the opportunity to note the consonance in "sCrap paCK"? Combine the consonance with the repeated short "A" sound and the fact that "Scrap Pack" contains only two syllables, both with heavy stresses—a spondee (sorry, didn't mean to patronize you all)—and you've got a very punchy nickname. Too bad you don't have any punch, Trans, or none of this would be necessary—you would've just verbally bitch slapped Navigator.

Oh, I wouldn't say it rhymes.

I was playing a drinking game Saturday, where you had to 'bust a rhyme' - rhyme a word with one that someone else had said or drink. I was bothered when someone rhymed 'time' with 'line'.

I am probably wrong, but it feels to me like just another symptom of the dumbing down of America and the English language.

It depends on your purposes, I think. For the purposes of modern English language poetry, full rhyme has limited use, since English is a rhyme poor language and the tradition of rhyming is really borrowed from Italian and other, older poetic traditions that, while they have their own merits, have a different word bank and syntactic system to work with than do English poets. For the purposes of a drinking game, I wouldn't consider participants' definition of rhyme the primary symptom of the dumbing down of America.

Charlies post # 14 is my candidate for Post Of The Year.

I can't decide which is more embarrassing: that you were playing a drinking game in which you had to rhyme words, or that you were playing a drinking game.

Yeah it was an afternoon of 'man, being a frat daddy was cool, let's try that again'.

However, drinking games can be fun. Canned drinking games make me feel like I am borrowing someone else's life.

Ha ha. It has assonance.

A rather pronouced, impressive assonance....

Another way of saying it has assonance is "it gets the rhyme wrong."

Or, rap is crap rhyming. And hip-hop is not tip-top two-timing.

It's got junk in the trunk?

In a prosodic, poetic, and very real, sense it does rhyme - internally rather than at the end is all.

Ok, that's it, we're saying it rhymes.  Phew, I'm out of my league here.

I like it. But then, what is the penalty if someone were to use, say, The Oui Men instead of The Scrap Pack?

The original post said the penalty was "pain of death" or season-tickets to the Pirates.

I think I'll go with Pepper Spray and Theriot. Pseudo-rhyming is cool and all that, but anytime you can work four puns into one nickname, that gets my vote. Do I have to pay for the season tickets?

Y'all'll be sorry when I'm a thousandaire from selling t-shirts of Font and Riot-lookalike tiger cubs saying "grr" in a text bubble to drunk white girls in Lakeview. The way I figure, I'll make enough money to either go to a game at Wrigley or buy a house near the Cell.

Congrats to Scrap Packers.

i'm calling the nickname and the players "The Crap Pack"

yeah, i went there.

Chad, don't badmouth those young Cubbies. You must be one of those Cubs fan who don't actually like anything about the team....DAMN YOU!!!!

Manny, you know I'm the TCR rebel blacksheep and you know I calls them likes i sees them.

I refuse to drink the RobG. kook aid!

There's RobG kool aid? What does it taste like?

(this should be entertaining)

i don't know as i already stated that i refuse to drink it.

But since you went to maine east and then marquette, i would assume it takes like MGD mixed with Drakkar Noir. With a slight hint of sausage.

"it takes like MGD mixed with Drakkar Noir. With a slight hint of sausage."

Nicely done.

This is exactly why Democracy is a failure. Never let people vote for things. Scrap Pack is pretty stupid. Its not really even funny. It doesnt even pass the "hey, thats not a dumb cliche" test. I think that the writers here could have come up with something better and come to a consensus over a couple of beers and a Vienna Beef dog at Murphy's.

Sigh.

At least there is parachat.

communist.

Communists get to vote.

Ha! Yeah, that's stupid. At least there's parachat. "In my pants" humor anyone?

I propose the Cubs trade Jake Fox for this guy.

It was me who came up with that, for the record. Any criticism of my hilarious creation will refuted with insults of your sexual preference. Proceed with caution.

Yeah, well I don't like it at all.

What are you going to do about it? hmmm....call me gay?

Yes. You're gay.

The other problem with it, is that it will be too easy for other teams' fans to make fun of the T-Shirt. "what is that, 'crap pack'? Is that like a colostomy bag?".

term has already been coined by me.

nice try, Trans already noted it in the post...

don't see it.

mine

Focus on the most important part. It may come to you.

work your way from the bottom up, look for the bullet point.

don't see it don't care

mine

You can have colostomy bag.

Levine says that Lee's neck and back issues a bigger culprit in his decline, along with his refusal to sit.

Although most people point to the broken wrist Lee suffered in 2006 as the reason he doesn't hit with as much power, the real reasons are his back and neck woes from a home-plate collision after the wrist injury.

http://espn.go.com/chicago/columns/blog?post=41054...

Interesting in that pitch selection has nothing to do with Lee's problems with grounding to short.

Also, Levine is happy to take another needless shot at Bradley. So far, Bradley is winning the 'media is out to get me' debate.

Well partially it does, but those pitches that he now hits weakly to second for double plays used to be doubles in the right-center power alley. He can't quite extend with power to the outer part of the plate like he used to.

I see your argument, though. If you can't do hit that pitch anymore, quit fucking swinging at it.

Yes, or move closer to the plate, or go back to your old hitting stance if this one, which seems to contort the back more is giving you problems.

Personally, AZ PHIL has mentioned that HOFF is "Gold Glove Caliber" at 1st B, and hits for power - something DLEE is just not doing well right now.

It would not be so bad if The Hoff gets a few more starts at 1B.

I would be all for a straight platoon. Some time during the offseason I predicted that they'd be platooning by the end of the year.

I just don't feel, that in his 60's, Lou will put a career minor leaguer (even though performing well) in a platoon situation with a former MVP and All Star.

hoff's lack of K'ing is getting increasingly interesting as far as what kind of player he can be.

sure, he's not exactly picking his pitches even though he's got some walks...he's hacking...he's just not missing as much.

that said...yeah, it's probably dlee's job to lose and it's probably not going to happen in early May unless he goes on a hell of a down-turn.

former MVP?

"Unfortunately for Lee there's no remedy for a bulging disc and upper-neck and back pain. The only thing Lee can do is ask out of the lineup and wait for it to subside, which he refuses to do. [ ] That type of philosophy has hurt Lee as he's not the offensive player he was prior to the injury."

[ ]

"And although I don't know the extent of the injury to Bradley (strained right groin), he should probably pay attention to Lee's work ethic."

I am confused. Is he saying Bradley should play even through his doing so would make him a poorer player, or does he think that Bradley should stay on the bench until he is fully healed?

I think he was saying, I wanted to take a shot at Bradley in some way.

He's saying that he likes cake and he likes to eat it, too.

In the meantime, Ramirez and Soto, get free passes.

will start tomorrow for Padres...

Fail.

When do we learn the DFA/Vizcaino aftermath? Will we get anything back for this move? (besides an empty roster spot?)

10 days from last Thursday, so I think by this coming Saturday they have to make a decision.

Thanks, Rob. Have any guesses about what comes back? (just for fun)

an empty roster spot....

...stupid 10pm EST games....well, 9:40, but whatever...

Has Wittenmyer "tweeted" the line-up for the game tonight?

cst_cubs: Lineup: sori, riot, fuky, rejo, hoff, soto, font, miles, lilly.

2-man bench tonight, Z is on Lou's card as an extra hitter.

reed johnson hitting 4th and soriano leads off...okay. okay...

Awesome. I feel like Rejo's going DEEP tonight, fellas. DEEP!

Reed Johnson batting 4th? Oh brother...

no no no no no

YOU of all people don't get to complain about batting order. you are the one who loves to site James' and his dis-belief that liineup order matters.

HA HA

I think even Bill James would laugh at that lineup last night. If the Cubs can't field anyone better than Reed Johnson in the #4 hole, they are in deep trouble.

Marmol available Tuesday according to Wittenmyer...

Geez - why not Soto 8th? Or, a start for Hill. He is in an outrageous slump.

"Scrap Pack" is the Jose Vizcaino of nicknames. Serviceable but bland.

"Scrappy Deux" (without the extra "-ot" mind you) is easily superior, working on more levels with surprising effect--the Doug Dascenzo of nicknames.

Wither "Tiger Cubs," the clear champion of the three, full of promise but potentially diminishing with increased exposure, no doubt the Gary Scott of nicknames.

this is by far the Kevin Orie of posts.

Recent comments

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  • ...and the Bryant RBI jinx continues in the 3rd....crap.

    billybucks 1 hour 21 min ago view
  • bryant's in the dugout filling a police report BECAUSE HE JUST GOT ROBBED.

    f'n cabrerra...

    crunch 1 hour 58 min ago view
  • chapman showing up and available tomorrow night.

    i'm sure he'll be a bit hit. hope he doesn't choke. dude has a rifle for an arm. he'll add a bit of punch to the bullpen.

    crunch 1 hour 59 min ago view
  • the 'crosstown classic' sure has lost it's magic with interleague. the excitement level is barely noticable...maybe it's a bit more hype in the city, itself.

    crunch 2 hours 4 min ago view
  • Well he didn't leave a mark so its not that bad.

    Fuck that.

    Facts:

    He choked her.

    Her brother tackled him to separate him.

    He cooled off by shooting his gun in the garage.

    I don't have to like him on the team I follow.

    And you are others are free to not give a shit about his personal misgivings if you so choose as well.

     

     

    Rob G. 2 hours 23 min ago view
  • Sure, no marks and some inconsistencies in the witness's statements. But firing your gun into garage wall immediately after an argument and punching out your car window is still threatening and out of control behavior. There was certainly enough for MLB to think it warranted a 30-game suspension.

    Charlie 3 hours 34 min ago view
  • I'd prefer they be flexible with the closing situation depending on matchups. You're not really adding a lefty reliever if you use him strictly as a closer.

    Charlie 3 hours 34 min ago view
  • Stockpiling young talent isn't only for trading for someone like Chapman though. Even with an elite closer winning the World Series is basically a crap shoot so the key is to get to the playoffs as much as possible and not just mortgage everything on one year. Once you get there an elite bullpen certainly helps but the playoffs can be won by one hitter or starting pitcher getting hot (Murphy, Molina, Baumgardner) and a closer might not be able to stop that.

    johann 3 hours 59 min ago view
  • I'm also not crazy about press convictions. As the police report noted, there were no marks on the lady in question. There's a TMZ link (of course) to her police pictures, as well.

    I think the only way this trade goes real bad is if Cubbery intervenes and Chapman is suddenly bad for some reason.

    Old and Blue 4 hours 2 min ago view
  • I am right there with you closing in on 60.

    I don't care that much about "mortgaging" one player who is not only blocked by two guys, but is not ready to hit the majors for at least a couple years.

    There is no reason why this team, this year, can't have a real shot at something NONE of us have experienced.

    Further, I don't feel that even if they fall short that they have ruined their farm system.

    I have made my opinion clear here, with others, Warren was shit on the Cubs save one spot start.

    The E-Man 5 hours 31 min ago view
  • Trading for Warren, Warren sucking, getting Warren back for Chapman plus 3 prospects, sounds like Revenge of The Yankees on the former Boston executive. Old rivalries never die.

    I pray to the heavens above Chapman doesn't suck for some reason, or he'll be booed out of town faster than a Todd Hundley revival meeting.

    Old and Blue 5 hours 39 min ago view
  • I'm kind of nostalgic for the Schwarber-for-Miller rumors.

    Brick 5 hours 51 min ago view
  • This offseason, after some ridiculous playoff run and Chapman saving every game from here until the end of the postseason striking out 27/9innings, I welcome anyone to quote this thread and call me a dummy: I hate this trade, and my hate is 2 parts Chapman makes this team less likeable and 1 part that's a ridiculous overpay for 30 regular season innings and, at tops, 10 postseason innings. Already hoping they don't extend him.

    Charlie 5 hours 53 min ago view
  • btw...Thanks AZ Phil. I'm really enjoying your take on this trade.

    Cubster 6 hours 15 min ago view
  • I'm a bit disappointed on the Warren experience. Essentially they gave Castro away for crickets (OK, well they signed Zobrist with the Castro salary dump). Otherwise one might look at it as Chapman for Castro and our #1 minors prospect (Torres) + McKinney/Crawford. Seems pricey for a 2 month rental. We will see if this price tag is that steep in a relative way based on the remaining deadline deals for relievers.

    Cubster 6 hours 15 min ago view
  • Yep. One of the great things about this team (in addition to being really good at baseball) was the "likable" factor. Feels a bit different now. Who knows...maybe Chapman will be the king of the dance parties.

    billybucks 6 hours 24 min ago view